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    I've been really struggling lately
    marysings posted:
    I can't get rid of this feeling of being "less than". I am supposed to do the store bookwork and it's beginning to be a real effort. I finally balanced the past months bank statements to within 9 cents. Now June is off $1400+. I am a failure. I try so hard to be accurate. Balancing the checkbook used to be so easy for me. Now it's a HUGE struggle.

    I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
    ffltat responded:
    Hello Mary,

    I have been around the MD boards for a couple of years now. I do not write a lot but I read. I have seen many of your heartfelt, caring and insightful posts. You are not a failure. You are NOT less then.

    You are amazing. Please always remember that. I know it is hard when things get so dark. When the pain is all that you can think about.

    But I know you are an amazing person.
    marysings replied to ffltat's response:
    Thank you, ffltat. I certainly don't feel amazing but thank you for the compliment.

    I was beginning to think I was all alone on this board. I guess there are many of us on vacation. I'm glad you posted.

    I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
    ffltat replied to marysings's response:
    I know that it is hard. But you are not alone.

    I also deal with flashbacks. Hate them. Just when you think they are gone, they start up again. It can really ruin your day.
    lovely_lemon_tree replied to ffltat's response:
    Mary, just wanted to say that I'm thinking about you. I understand that things that used to be so easy for us now come with so much effort... been there, still doing that.

    melisfit responded:
    you are not a failure and not "less than". You're a kind, caring person that's just going through a tough time right now. Please don't forget that.

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