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tnmist posted:
I know this isn't on the same level as some of the trials out there right now, but my co-pay has increased significantly to see my T., and I've had to cut the number of sessions in half. I already wasn't going as often as what would have been optimal, but I made do, but now to cut it in half again - oh!

As the new year starts, the more I sink into depression about all of it. I just want to stuff all my feelings and traumas back inside and pretend I never knew anything, like how I had existed all my life anyway until 2012.

Process? I have nothing to process. Not me. No. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. Hide, hide hide. All of me just screams out to just hide away until I am granted death. Like I could actually get my life together anyway. Solitary life, money struggles, job struggles, people struggles, health struggles. There is just no end.

So sorry, just coming apart at the seams a bit here. Don't mind me. I'll be quiet now. I used to be an expert at keeping quiet.

Take care.

az330 responded:
Oh Misty!
I completely understand how you feel...I have been there and I sometimes regret bringing all this stuff to the surface. I still have many days like that...Hang in there....We are here for you.

tnmist replied to az330's response:
Thank you, AZ. My nights and days are upside down right now, but I'm going to try to get some sleep tonight. I have to be somewhere in the morning and function. Being with people sure is draining to me, but I also know it isn't healthy to completely isolate. I'm praying 2013 is way different than 2012. I don't think I could handle a repeat of last year.


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