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Posting to the communities has been restored. Our technical team is still completing ongoing maintenance, and you may experience some technical problems.Thank you for your continued support and patience, and if you have any further questions, please email

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tnmist posted:
I know this isn't on the same level as some of the trials out there right now, but my co-pay has increased significantly to see my T., and I've had to cut the number of sessions in half. I already wasn't going as often as what would have been optimal, but I made do, but now to cut it in half again - oh!

As the new year starts, the more I sink into depression about all of it. I just want to stuff all my feelings and traumas back inside and pretend I never knew anything, like how I had existed all my life anyway until 2012.

Process? I have nothing to process. Not me. No. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine. Hide, hide hide. All of me just screams out to just hide away until I am granted death. Like I could actually get my life together anyway. Solitary life, money struggles, job struggles, people struggles, health struggles. There is just no end.

So sorry, just coming apart at the seams a bit here. Don't mind me. I'll be quiet now. I used to be an expert at keeping quiet.

Take care.

az330 responded:
Oh Misty!
I completely understand how you feel...I have been there and I sometimes regret bringing all this stuff to the surface. I still have many days like that...Hang in there....We are here for you.

tnmist replied to az330's response:
Thank you, AZ. My nights and days are upside down right now, but I'm going to try to get some sleep tonight. I have to be somewhere in the morning and function. Being with people sure is draining to me, but I also know it isn't healthy to completely isolate. I'm praying 2013 is way different than 2012. I don't think I could handle a repeat of last year.


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