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I feel like damaged goods
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SimoneSmith posted:
I am feeling angry at myself, hurt, damaged goods, like all my work is a good progress yet slow, i want all of this to just be over. Having trust issues just screw up my relationship, trust after trauma have never been the same for me. I do have a good guy who can be annoying at times but he shows he love me in different ways, i am feeling like i don't deserve him that i am just damaging what we have because of my issues. From the first year of my relationship I was the one weak yet he stood there all through my crap and still with me and yet my trust is still not competently there. I don't know why is it because i feel i don't deserve to be love, or that i have my guards up to not feel pain because by trusting someone is putting your emotions at risk. I do trust him to a extend. I am feeling broken, I express my needs to him and he says he is willing to support my needs when it comes to vacation from sex. And yet my trust is not strong he feel hurt because he been trying to show me that he care about me and we been dating 5 yrs and 3 months now. I am feeling angry that all of this is happening, He mention to me he don't know how much he can take because of my trust issues. I am sad and feeling confused.
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bluerose90 responded:
Hi Simone,

Welcome to the board, but I am sorry that you have a need to be here. I think that all survivors have times when we feel like we are damaged goods... I honestly wish I could give you some advice to help, but trust issues is something that I struggle with myself. I'm so glad that you have someone there who is supportive to you. All I can really say is try to be patient with yourself and with him as well. I wish that there was a button we could push to skip over all of the healing that we have to do to recover from the things that happened to us, but I'm afraid that we just have to be patient with ourselves and work through it all the best we can.

Please take care of yourself.

Rose


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