Having a internal conversation cause we seem to be on the same page at the moment.And are the only ones that can tolerate ourselves when no one else can.Most times it's like I'll tolerate you long enough to hear what you have to say but don't give a flip about how you really feel or what cause you to feel that way.
we have created a safe place here to speak right?
Quis i don't think this is the place or the time
Quiet okay if not now then when?
Well what about never and a day
alright the idea of this is to share something one doesn't know about the other.I'll give you something that's not to difficult to speak/write about.The rest of the gang knows of this but not you cause you turned on the deaf ear.I'll give you the short version of it cause it's real late and we need some sleep.
The system knows about J but what you don't know is he wasn't the first one and because of the incident that happen I associate myself with an animal. Also the reason for the tearful and sleepless nights,reaching for alcohol and everything else.I still carry personal shame,pressing pressure and pain.Doing those things keeps the body from screaming but at the same time traumatizing the body by my own actions.With the secrecy and denial surrounding this but when that card was place on the car by you know who that cause it to be brought up again.
Okay the first one I wasn't that far along when the mom found out and she had time to do something about it.No one knew and I never told anyone anything cause I knew to keep my mouth shut or else.I was giving something to drink but don't know what.We waited for a while and then I had then worst pain going through me that I couldn't explain. Freaking out as to not knowing what was going on or what was about to happen.A little while after that I went to the bath room and I thought I had to go but that wasn't it.
I felt something and starting screaming.She ran in and told me to shut up before he hears me.Never saw or felt anything like it before in my life.After the drop I got and made the mistake of looking back and I just fell to the floor.This crazy woman scooped it out and started yelling at me saying YOU SEE WHAT YOU DID........GOD IS NOT HAPPY WITH YOU OR THIS AND YOU'RE GOING TO HELL FOR IT..............Here I am laid out on the floor and all she can do is hollar at me about something I can't wrap my mind around.Thinking to myself when is this s*** gonna end wishing I would just die to get away.Confuse as I stare up at her wondering why and how she could do that.
Now QUIET AND ALL there's a lot between here and there.But what this witch did after is to disturbing even for me and I don't think y'all can stomach it without tossing your cookies.Maybe a little later and you can share something as well.When I say these people is as evil as they come I truly whole heartly stress that.I said I was gonna give the short but didn't but had a lot to say.I apologize and it's two am so let's get some sleep and start fresh.
"THE SAME STRENGTH THAT IT TOOK TO TAKE IT,IS THE SAME AMOUNT OF STRENGTH THAT IT TAKES TO LET IT GO".
Q & Q AND THE REST OF SOULKEEPERS...........
Crying Is Like Taking Your Soul To The Laundry Mat!!!!!!!
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