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feel like ill never be loved for something i had no control over.
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feellikeillneverbelovedanymore posted:
well im 20 years old now, 4 year ago when i was 16, i was raped, by a man i didnt know. i was out drinking for my first time, blacked out, woke up in the hospital and was diagnosed with genital herpes. i broke down and cried. i kept telling myself im only 16 how could this happen to me, how do i handle something like this, no one will ever want to be with me, im disgusting. still till this day 4 years later, i feel disgusted and feel like i'd be judged and catch myself crying. i hate the fact that i have something forever now by an action i had no control over. i blame myself because i gave into drinking that one night, and i was always against drinking but i just was young and gave in and of course the one night i was trying to have fun and be a teenager this is what i get. but i cant blame myself for something like that. its not fair . but i need advice because this never leaves my mind and makes my reality hard to go on with when i meet someone. im just afraid i wont be loved or they will look at me with disgust and it just kills me to feel that way.
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abe648 responded:
You are not alone. We all did things we reggret otherwise we would not have herpes. Do not bown on yourself.

I want to give you Hope for the future. Life will go on and there is someone wjho will love you for who you are and not what you have. God Loves YOU.

You need to think of yourself as someone who is special and then someone will feel that you are special. You neeed to get out and met men who will love you uncondiionally.

Of course you will need to tell them before you have sex that you have herpes. That is something that wil come with time and practivce. God Bless you.

I would recommend that you read the Herpes Handbook and watch the video as per my signature line. I would recommend that you get Terri Warrens book as well.
Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/
 
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abe648 replied to abe648's response:
I recommend that you google Herpes Support Groups on Yahoo to see it there is a support group near where you live. If there is one go and someone can help you in person as to how move forward with your life. If there is no support group then let us know and we can help you and be your support group here on this site.

Remember you are not alone. If you will go back pages and pages and pages about 20 or more on this site you will find lots of posts of people who faced the same issues you are vacing and that will give you some help as well.

If you will click on the Tiger you can read my story.
God Bless You.
Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/
 
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abe648 responded:
The other thing is that as a female your odds of transmitting it to your partner are only about 1/2 half of a male transmitting it to a female.

The odds of you giving it to a partner are as follwing: If you avoid sex when you have an ob only the ods of him getting is only 4% and if you avoid sex and are on a suppresive herapy then he has only a 2% chabce if getting it from you. if to the above that you use a condom then his chances dropp to only1% of him getting it from you.

That 1% is the same odds of you getting pregnant while on birth control. So as you see it is not all that large.

Ask any questions and so we can help you get over your fears and move on with your life.
Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/
 
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badnewsbear88 responded:
i'm very newly diagnosed, struggling with it myself, and not really able to offer advice, but i just wanted to give you a big virtual hug because you sound like you need it. this is not your fault. i don't care if you were drinking, i wouldn't care if you were sauntering naked down a dark alleyway in the middle of the night... you didn't deserve what happened to you, and the only person at fault is the psycho who violated and infected you.

i'll leave the actual advice to more informed posters like abe648, but please, always remember this. you didn't deserve this, and none of it is your fault.
 
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abe648 replied to badnewsbear88's response:
Badnewsbear You gave a great response and you are right that the only bad person in this is the person who forced himself on her. She has nothing to feel bad about.

You may be new to this but you give good advice and would be welcome to post more replies like this in the future..
Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/


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