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HPV1 HELP
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live_for_tomorrow posted:
If I am honest, I don't really know were to start.. my emotions and head is pretty much everywhere.
Basically, about 6months ago I came out of a long term relationship due to it not working out for a number of reasons.. so been in my final year of uni I wanted to experience what its like to be single and have some fun.

I had been going on nights out, having a good time.. engaging in sexual activites a few times.. but on the last occasion (nearly 3 weeks ago) the condom split during intercourse, tbh I wasn't really worried as I am on the pill... and I guess I am kind of niave as I never at the time even thought about the risk of contracting an std.

Anyway 3 days later I started to notice a small painful lump near the opening on the vagina, it was really painful... so I went to the gum clinic for testing and was told to retturn a week later for results. Over that week more lumps appeared, the whole area became swollen, along with the anal region aswell, and currently I am unable to bare going to the toilet.

I went back to the gum clinic2 days ago and found out I am infected with hsv1 and chlymidia. When I found out I can't explain the pain it caused me.. from that one unfortunate time I end up with 2 stds..
The chlymidia has gone now, but herpes I will be left with for the rest of my life. I have had these vaginal sores for 2 weeks now, I can't even explain the pain I am in, and I am to aashamed to tell anyone. I don't even know how to move on in my life. I can't go to uni, placement or work because the vaginal area becomes painful when I walk. Furthermore, I need to tell my mum, but how can I, she will be so ashamed of me, just like everyone else would be. I mean who would want to date me now, if I told any of the guys I like that I have herpes they would run for the hills.. so I have come tobthe conclusion that I will be alone for a while, but I guess its my own fault for sleeping with a goodlooking guy from a bar.

Well id love to hear from anyone who wants to talk, I really could do with some support. Thanks for reading.
Reply
 
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TheWhatFor responded:
To thank you for offer some sympathetic words on my post I'll do the best I can to encourage you.
A mutual friend of mine and my ex (not the one that cheated) that actually introduced us had herpes. She was a very pretty girl that worked as a waitress in a bar I used to frequent. I never knew about it until much later in mine and X's relationship when she told me in confidence because she needed input on advice to give our friend about her relationship. It was a delicate situation that that info was pertinent. I should have realized when a situation with her and a friend of mine had an awkward moment at my place. He was looking to hook up and wanted to but for some reason couldn't. Looking back she wanted the one night stand and saw it as that but knew the risk she posed to him and protected him which is admirable. You could tell it was difficult for her at the time and I just assumed it was one of the mysteries of a woman. She didn't share her reason with him as he did not need to know since she knew he was not boy friend material. Later down the road however as I had mentioned before she was in a relationship. As all couples will experience they had their moments but they were a great fit for each other. I will do my best to relay what X told me of their situation as it should be encouraging for you.
They met and hit it off as coworkers, really just good friends at first but later there were mutual feelings that he eventually acted on, or tried to at first. She turned him down with no excuse and it was obviously a painful moment for her. Being that her deeply cared for her and seeing that something was wrong below the surface he attempted to talk about it and get an answer from her. Eventually he backed off and suggested just a friendship. Later on while they were hanging out one night and after some drinks they shared another kiss and upon another weird reaction from her he asked again. In her liquid courage and desire to be with him she told him about her herpes. He was caught of guard by the situation of course but handled it well. Her secret was safe with him but in light of the new information he thought it best to back off that night. It was really a way for him to take the time to think about what he was willing risk to be with her. Next day she was devastated thinking that her secret cost her a man she felt deeply for. She cried all that next day and night over it even cried herself to sleep. She was awoke by a knock at the door at 2 am and it was him. He told her that the only risk he wasn't willing to take was not being with her (I doubt his actual words were close to that but im making a bigger point). Speaking from a guys perspective there are a few of us out there that have hearts. When a dude falls for your heart there isn't much that will deter him. I will admit it takes a strong person to deal with that. It took a while for friendship to turn into a relationship but they did. Anytime she had an out break and the following week there was no sexual contact but they made it work. I dont know how they turned out as I moved after me and the X split up but i know for at least that the time I was there they were mostly happy.
Assuming since you're at a university you live in a large town as we did at the time. There could be a benefit to that. Keep your head up. And likewise, if you need some to talk to, I'm a few keystrokes away.
 
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TheWhatFor responded:
To thank you for offer some sympathetic words on my post I'll do the best I can to encourage you.
A mutual friend of mine and my ex (not the one that cheated) that actually introduced us had herpes. She was a very pretty girl that worked as a waitress in a bar I used to frequent. I never knew about it until much later in mine and X's relationship when she told me in confidence because she needed input on advice to give our friend about her relationship. It was a delicate situation that that info was pertinent. I should have realized when a situation with her and a friend of mine had an awkward moment at my place. He was looking to hook up and wanted to but for some reason couldn't. Looking back she wanted the one night stand and saw it as that but knew the risk she posed to him and protected him which is admirable. You could tell it was difficult for her at the time and I just assumed it was one of the mysteries of a woman. She didn't share her reason with him as he did not need to know since she knew he was not boy friend material. Later down the road however as I had mentioned before she was in a relationship. As all couples will experience they had their moments but they were a great fit for each other. I will do my best to relay what X told me of their situation as it should be encouraging for you.
They met and hit it off as coworkers, really just good friends at first but later there were mutual feelings that he eventually acted on, or tried to at first. She turned him down with no excuse and it was obviously a painful moment for her. Being that her deeply cared for her and seeing that something was wrong below the surface he attempted to talk about it and get an answer from her. Eventually he backed off and suggested just a friendship. Later on while they were hanging out one night and after some drinks they shared another kiss and upon another weird reaction from her he asked again. In her liquid courage and desire to be with him she told him about her herpes. He was caught of guard by the situation of course but handled it well. Her secret was safe with him but in light of the new information he thought it best to back off that night. It was really a way for him to take the time to think about what he was willing risk to be with her. Next day she was devastated thinking that her secret cost her a man she felt deeply for. She cried all that next day and night over it even cried herself to sleep. She was awoke by a knock at the door at 2 am and it was him. He told her that the only risk he wasn't willing to take was not being with her (I doubt his actual words were close to that but im making a bigger point). Speaking from a guys perspective there are a few of us out there that have hearts. When a dude falls for your heart there isn't much that will deter him. I will admit it takes a strong person to deal with that. It took a while for friendship to turn into a relationship but they did. Anytime she had an out break and the following week there was no sexual contact but they made it work. I dont know how they turned out as I moved after me and the X split up but i know for at least that the time I was there they were mostly happy.
Assuming since you're at a university you live in a large town as we did at the time. There could be a benefit to that. Keep your head up. And likewise, if you need some to talk to, I'm a few keystrokes away.
 
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abe648 responded:
OK so this is not so bad. You can treat the clymida (sp?) and the HSV 1 genitally is not that big of a deal. There are many guys who will love you for who you are and not what you have. HSV genitally wil give you one more ob in the first year and then on average you wil get one more ob every other year.

Since this is still bothering you then go back to see the Gyn clinc as some times gals can get other infections at the same time and think it is herpes when it is not. With all this pain you need to be seen again as by now (2 weeks later) you should be feeling better. So go back and get this looked after.

The other thing you need to know is that you can still get HSV 2 genitally even if you have HSV 1 genitally. So the next time you have a feeling for a guy make sure that both of you go and get a complete STD testing and make sure that both of you ask for and get a type specific Igg blood ttest for HSv 1 & 2 to see what each other have.

I want you to know that your life is nott over. You can live love laugh and be intimate again with the right person.

Be sure to tell someone close to you who will not reveal your story to others and who will not judge you. They may not be able to know how you feel but they can help you see that it is not that bad of a problem.

God Bless you and let us know how things go in your life. There is always someone to talk to here on this site. Read the info in my signature line below.
Abe ... Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/


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