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How to Tell Your Partner
An_254632 posted:
I am 54 years old and have had Herpes2 for 30 years. I was married for 25 years and my husband never contracted it from me. We had unprotected sex through out our marriage. I have only had three outbreaks in 30 years last being about 10 years ago. I have been on suppressive meds Valtrax for 6 years. A friend and I have become more than friends and want to move forward with a sexual relationship. I am afraid to tell him. How do you tell someone about this? For me it has not been a big deal. But the word Herpes freaks people out. Also, does anyone have the stats on female on suppressive meds transmitting the disease to male partners?
abe648 responded:
Female to Male Transmission for HSV 2
The odds of you getting GHSV 2 is as follows. If the two of you avoid sex when she has an ob then the chances of you getting it is 4%. If she takes suppressive therapy then it drops to 2% and if you use condoms then it go's to 1%. The details are from the Valtrex clinical trials study. At your age most likely you may not want to use condoms and so it increases your risk a bit higher to 2% which is still very low risk. This is info is from the Valtrex Clinical Truals Study

Are you still taking Valtrex as there is now a generic Valacyclovir which is a lot cheaper.

Abe ...I am not a medical professional. Read the Herpes Handbook, Watch the Video and Terri Warren's book is availible umder the Heading Herpes at
abe648 responded:
At your age most guys you will meet and want to be with have a much more mature view of life and as you say it is not a big deal to you and if you do not make it a big deal when you tell him then it will not be big deal to him either.

Search in the Search box at the top of this "Telling Partner" and you wil come up with lots of ideas
Abe ...I am not a medical professional. Read the Herpes Handbook, Watch the Video and Terri Warren's book is availible umder the Heading Herpes at
Anon_137742 responded:
I am also a woman who has had HSV2 for 30 years. I've been in a relationship with a wonderful man for the past 2.5 years and he is STD free.

Check out my extended reply today to "New Relationship.

You can find out a wealth of information on STDs in Terri Warren's book, "The Good News About the Bad News".
I educated myself by reading that book. It helped with the language I used when I told my (potential) honey, and I also gave a copy to him when I told him I had HSV2.

The next few weeks were difficult for us but I have to say that it has helped us to communicate about a lot of different things (unrelated to herpes) because when you can talk about intimate sexual issues, everything else is a breeze!

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