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Good %22Telling Partner%22 stories
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lonelygirl2009 posted:
Alright, following Abe's suggestion, let's start a discussion of people's experiences telling their partners. If we put them all in one place, it will be easier for people to find. If you've already posted your experience in another thread, maybe you can re-post your story here, too. It'll be a good resource for all of us who are wondering what to do.

Thanks to everyone who can help with this topic.
93 Replies |Watch This Discussion | Report This| Share this:Good %22Telling Partner%22 storiesAlright, following Abe's suggestion, let's start a discussion of people's experiences telling their partners. If we put them all in one place, it will be easier for people to find. If you've already posted your experience in another thread, maybe you can re-post your story here, too. It'll be a good resource for all of us who are wondering what to do. <br><br>Thanks to everyone who can help with this topic.
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An_208426 replied to lovepugs1's response:
Wow thanks for sharing this... I have yet to be intimate again and thus too scared to tell anyone. I have even withdrawn from relationships and thrown myself into work just thinking no way anyone would ever want me now and put a lot of importance on intimacy in relationships so I just have thought it was time to get used to be being lonely. Your post has given me hope-- I am still terrified and start to tear up thinking about having to tell someone for fear of exposing myself incase they say no they cant deal with it. I know the news would spread so fast and everyone has such a stigma against it! Ive encountered so many situations where people even tell me not to talk to certain people or guys because they have been rumored to have herpes (which turned out to be just rumored an std but they wanted to tell me the worst they could think of so I would not talk to them?) Little did they know they were talking to someone who had it themselves.. I dont feel dirty I know I am a good girl and definitely not a slut but thats how people will look at you... I thought.. but like i said your post gave me hope. thakn you.
Report This| Share this:Good %22Telling Partner%22 storiesWow thanks for sharing this... I have yet to be intimate again and thus too scared to tell anyone. I have even withdrawn from relationships and thrown myself into work just thinking no way anyone would ever want me now and put a lot of importance on intimacy in relationships so I just have thought it was time to get used to be being lonely. Your post has given me hope-- I am still terrified and start to tear up thinking about having to tell someone for fear of exposing myself incase they say no they cant deal with it. I know the news would spread so fast and everyone has such a stigma against it! Ive encountered so many situations where people even tell me not to talk to certain people or guys because they have been rumored to have herpes (which turned out to be just rumored an std but they wanted to tell me the worst they could think of so I would not talk to them?) Little did they know they were talking to someone who had it themselves.. I dont feel dirty I know I am a good girl and definitely not a slut but thats how people will look at you... I thought.. but like i said your post gave me hope. thakn you.
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2FACED responded:
have had gh for 6years now. am married with four kids. really and living a lie. becuz my husband does not know. i am in denial and don't want this to be true. we broke up breifly a while back and that is when i got it. i love him soo much and don't want him to look at me differntly or hate me for ever. really have had so many times i have wanted to tell him but fear the worse. i know i have to tell him regardless what happens, but need the strength and confidence. really hate myself!
Report This| Share this:Good %22Telling Partner%22 stories<i>have had gh for 6years now. am married with four kids. really and living a lie. becuz my husband does not know. i am in denial and don't want this to be true. we broke up breifly a while back and that is when i got it. i love him soo much and don't want him to look at me differntly or hate me for ever. really have had so many times i have wanted to tell him but fear the worse. i know i have to tell him regardless what happens, but need the strength and confidence. really hate myself!</i>
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mecb1987 replied to lovepugs1's response:
Glad you posted this. I was young when I was diagnosed too, well, not as young, but i was 20 i think when i first was. i was devastated. got it from a guy i was hooking up with for awhile and not really even dating. he didnt know he had it..or said he didnt know.. he never had an outbreak and after i told him i had it he got tested and had it..at first he blamed me, and said how do i know i didnt get it from you? well, i wasnt sleeping around and the last guy i had been with was a longer faithful relationship. anyways, i knew it was from him..he was kind of a party guy who ran around.
he said eventually a long SORRY and that he probably got it from his ex(or so he thought)
i have been with the same guy now for four years and we have a two year old together.
to this day my boyfriend has never had an outbreak, we always have unprotected sex when i dont have outbreaks and we never think about the herpes ever..
he is fine with it and im happy for that.
not everyone is so understanding, but you will have that.
people do not realize std's are easy to get, you do not HAVE to be a slut or dirty to get an std...all it takes is having sex once...
i cannot take it back now so all i can do is live with it.
my son was born healthy and we are all good here!! i rarely have outbreaks anymore, i am 25 now..and do not take any medicine for it.
Report This| Share this:Good %22Telling Partner%22 storiesGlad you posted this. I was young when I was diagnosed too, well, not as young, but i was 20 i think when i first was. i was devastated. got it from a guy i was hooking up with for awhile and not really even dating. he didnt know he had it..or said he didnt know.. he never had an outbreak and after i told him i had it he got tested and had it..at first he blamed me, and said how do i know i didnt get it from you? well, i wasnt sleeping around and the last guy i had been with was a longer faithful relationship. anyways, i knew it was from him..he was kind of a party guy who ran around.<br />he said eventually a long SORRY and that he probably got it from his ex(or so he thought)<br />i have been with the same guy now for four years and we have a two year old together.<br />to this day my boyfriend has never had an outbreak, we always have unprotected sex when i dont have outbreaks and we never think about the herpes ever..<br />he is fine with it and im happy for that.<br />not everyone is so understanding, but you will have that.<br />people do not realize std's are easy to get, you do not HAVE to be a slut or dirty to get an std...all it takes is having sex once...<br />i cannot take it back now so all i can do is live with it.<br />my son was born healthy and we are all good here!! i rarely have outbreaks anymore, i am 25 now..and do not take any medicine for it.
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abe648 replied to 2FACED's response:
I am glad all you guys & gals found this helpful and that this gives you hope.

If you have any words of encouragement then please do post them and if you are struggling with herpes then post your own questions so we can help you with this as well.

Just to update you we have been married for over 30 years now and my wife still does not have HSV 2. And I think I used approx 5 dozen of condoms in our marriage.

God Bless all of you
Abe ... Read more in the Herpes Handbook. Watch the Herpes Video and Terri Warren's book The Good News about the Bad News. All located under the heading Herpes at http://www.westoverheights.com/
Report This| Share this:Good %22Telling Partner%22 storiesI am glad all you guys &amp; gals found this helpful and that this gives you hope. <br /> <br />If you have any words of encouragement then please do post them and if you are struggling with herpes then post your own questions so we can help you with this as well. <br /> <br />Just to update you we have been married for over 30 years now and my wife still does not have HSV 2. And I think I used approx 5 dozen of condoms in our marriage. <br /> <br />God Bless all of you
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