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How to cope with rejection?
An_243735 posted:
I've had HSV 2 for 9 years. I find living with it pretty easy. Honestly, I don't think about it very often and remember I have it only when I'm single and needing to have 'the talk,' which i do before getting intimate with someone. I have told 5 people in 9 years, 3 of which became my boyfriends (dated them for 1 year or more), 2 of which rejected me. The first who rejected did so because, I think, I was new to telling and didn't handle it well (plus I didn't know him well). The second was very recent and it shocked me to the core. This is someone who really cared about me and wanted a relationship with me. While we had only been seeing each other for a little less than a month (just shy of four weeks), we saw each other often and had gotten very close. Things were moving along so I knew I needed to have the talk with him. I did and it seemed to go well. He didn't take it poorly at first. However, the next day he called to tell me he wanted to think about it and he'd get back with me. He sent me a text the next day to tell me he didn't want to see me anymore. The thing is, his dad is an OB/GYN and I suggested he talk with him, knowing that his dad may give him the doom and gloom speech. You see, doctors see all the worst cases and they don't hear about discordant couples having successful LT relationships, so I'm assuming what he heard was the worst.

This guy now wants nothing to do with me. I feel like I have a scarlet letter branded across my chest. He said everything would be great if it wasn't for this one thing. What does that mean?? I'm still the same person I was the day before I told him, but he, literally, can't do this (date me) because of the virus. I understand, but I don't understand. I've already tried giving him my perspective, but he won't budge at all. I know this is fear-based, so is there nothing you can do in this situation? Any suggestions?
plycsh7 responded:
I would let him be and see if he comes around if he does not his loss. You did the right thing by telling him and for him to blow you off like that is not right. Just be glad it was almost a month and not longer because I hate wasting my time with guys when it does not work out.

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