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Trying To Turn Back To God.
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renetta34 posted:
I've been battling this for a while. I always did believe in God. I grew up in the church and it was something that always concerned me. I grew up in the baptist faith and I was wondering if they belive in decernment (spirit by the spirit). when I was a very young girl I was molested by someone in my family and at first I was very mad at God I use to pray to him and ask him not to let it happen again but it always did. I was theating with dealth of myself and my mother if I toll anybody some i didn't but I was wondering why no one could see it al over me. I was so broken and torn and I still am. I love God but right now I can't hear him maybe it's because I don't want to. I have had so many things happen to me in my life until sometimes I don't know if I'm coming or going. My health was going down hill fast but I started going to the doctors and got some of that stuff under control but the thing with the mind is still out there. I will be seeing a mental health doctor soon and I'm some whaat glad because I really need help. I was just wondering where are the leaders in the church that suppose to notice thing that are not natural? God and I have a broken relationship right now I hoping it get better but sometimes I feel that I maynot mind going to hell because it can't be that much worst than what I have been going though since I was born.
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4jesus responded:
Hi rennetta34: First of all, if you think hell is not as bad as what you're going through now, you must rethink it. Goid ia slways there for us, in good times and in bad. As far as the church elderrs, they're not supposed to recognise the problems of the congregation. I don't know what affliation you are, but you can go to youyr pastor and talk things things over with him/her. I'll be praying for you. Keep in touch, and let us know on the board how you're doing. God's blessing to you and take care. Ron
 
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monadelite responded:
well what can you say to me . i have been praying for a long time for a church home that will just accecpt me. see i have a severe mental illness. though it may not show. i go thruogh battles every day .most churches don't understand, while others what to cast out demons. one even said i don't have the faith to be healed. frankly i don't believe everyone will be healed,but threw their struggles and their faith in god i will able stand. see when i'm in the hospital it's diffrent. there aren't any iv's no tubes, just people in street clothes some talking to them selves,some crying, or like me sitting alone doing both. most ministers can't handle it.saying i'm to needy. i was even told my past does not matter but don't you have to know where you have been in order to deal with the present and adjust to the future. i don't want anyone to thinck i want god on my terms. i just what to be accecpted as i am by people who can help me see that dispite all god is out there and he cares even when my head is saying not so. my freinds say god is not for people like us, i say it is for people like us he came. thanks
 
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JUST_A_KID responded:
What can be said that will allow you to under stand what God can do monadelite, see everyday we people go through life asking God for help, for healing for assistance and what we ask for we are not getting it...

The beauty of this is that God not only assist us in what we exactly wants but he assist us with simple little blessing each day, that we might not realize and thank him for.

Blessings are like Carton boxes of different sizes stored up for us and we need to stop and think about those small boxes of blessing we get and appreciate them, you see what wait for you in heaven is Greater that that of earth. Worry not your self about what happening, although i am sorry that your not finding a church home, but the temple of the lord reside in you and the pure heart is what matters the most.

You can just go to any church thats close to you and lift your voice in praise to God, there is a prayer in Palsm 51 "Have mercy upon me oh God , according to thy loving kindness, and thy tender mercies, blot out thy transgression and clense me from my sins..." i will have you in my prayers and you pray too in the spirit and have faith, dont let know one steal your joy.

God be with you Greg
 
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Concerned_Disciple responded:
To renetta34,

As someone who has gone through quite a bit in a young lifetime, i can say with confidence that God is able to heal. No matter if people say what He will or can't do. I know God to be a healer. I, too, have experienced hardship and turmoil, at the hand of others, and some by the winds of life. But, what I want you to understand is that nothing is too hard for God. I've been through depression at the lowest points in my life, when things just happened to me. But, God delivered me out of my troubles. It wasn't easy. But if you have faith in God to believe: 1. He loves you and 2. He can deliver you and change your life. That's all it takes ...is faith.

As far as spiritual leaders are concerned, some have the ability to discern people, but others do not. I think it depends on their teaching and experience in spiritual matters and the Word of God. But, one thing to remember is, when people don't understand what's going on in your life, when people can't see with their natural eye that you need help and encouragement, God sees! Not only does he see, but He can do what people can't do.

It's sad to say, but people don't always understand the need to reach out to others. We are supposed to help one another. But, some people can't help others because they don't know how to help themselves. So, what do we do then? When it seems no one, especially those who we expect to be there for us, are there to understand and encourage us? What do we do when we don't have the strength within ourselves to stay strong and be confident?

We must believe God. It doesn't mean things will not get harder before getting better. But taking that step of faith to know that your situation can change.

I know what God can do. And you have to remember too, that the Devil (Satan) attacks those who are a great threat to him. Don't think because of all you have experienced in life, you have no purpose. God has a plan for your life. Sometimes, it can be hard to comprehend that because you don't understand why you have to go through the most terrible of situations.

But, please trust God. As you trust Him and confess that you want Him to help you, expect that He will. He sees your tears and knows your heart.

I can only tell you what I know. And since God did if for me, He will do it for you.

Be Encouraged,

Concerned Disciple
 
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jendub25 responded:
Renetta, We have a very Understanding God, he is patient and he is Kind. We go through trials in life not because he is spiteful or trying to punish us. He is making us stronger because it takes a strong person to keep their Faith and have the knowledge that God walks with us in those trials of our lives. When my husband left me, I felt too that I had lost God, I thought how could God let this happen to me, what evil did i do in my life that I would deserve such pain. I prayed for God to fix the situation. But I realized that I had to rise above the situation and have Faith in my Lord, He walked with me in my Pain, He held my hand when I cried, and gave me the Strength to make it through the day. Remember God did not promise Sunshine without rain He did not promise Happiness without Pain But he did promise Light for the way God Is always with you
 
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LOVE000 responded:
I'M SO SORRY YOU HAVE THESE EMOTIONS... FEELINGS THAT TORMENT YOU DAILY. HAUNT YOUR EVERY WAKING HOUR AND SLEEP TOO. I UNDERSTAND ONLY TOO WELL ( 101 THOUSAND %) . I PRAY AND WISH AND WANT TO BELIEVE WITH EVERY OUNCE OF MY BEING THAT SINCE YOU'RE REACHING "OUT" THAT YOU WILL WIN!!! THIS BATTLE. I PRAY JESUS SWARMS YOUR ENTIRE BEING WITH HIS LOVE AND THIS WILL KICK SATAN TO THE CURB. PRAYERFULLY YOU WILL EXPERIENCE A PEACE AND "JOY" YOU'VE OH SO LOOONGED FOR. KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND FOCUS ON FAITH AND GODS LOVE... WE PRAYERFULLY WILL BE EMERSED IN HIS LOVE HERE ON EARTH IN SO DOING NOT ENTERTAIN THE DEVILS WILES OF SUICDE THAT WE CAN ONLY RECEIVE GODS PEACE AND LOVE IN HEAVEN. HIS LOVE IS HERE TOOOOOO , PROMISE JESUS LOVES YOU AND YOU'RE AN INSPIRATION AND A WITNESS FOR EVERYONE , BECAUSE " EVERY-1 !!! IS HUMAN "
 
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VicDer responded:
...i can understand as a young girl i was molested by a family member...it can be hard to come to terms with and at a point in my teenage years i did turn away from God and my family. It hurts us so much more then we can understand when something like that happends to us....i think that after being angry for so many years(and some days i still get a little angry and that is normal because it is rightous anger) ..it is always good to have a support team...a safety net....but just remember that through all of this GOD is still with you.. you just have to realize in your own time...i will pray for you and your family....and sweetie please dont ever forget there are people around you who love you...and we all care for you...please dont forget that!! just because those people in the church didnt want to see or maybe were scared to see didnt help doesnt mean that everyone out there in the world isnt going to listen to you.....we are all humans and all make mistakes so forgive them and your family....
 
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Makakis responded:
I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you. 2 Kings 20:5

"For I know the plans I have for you,"declares the Lord,"plans to prosper you and not to harm you,plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5
 
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timw68 responded:
Renetta34, I was going through some hard times. I hit my rock bottom. Everything made me angry, or sad. One of the biggest things for me was that I'm 28 and single, and I long for a family of my own. I hated my life and it drove me to drink. I couldn't have anyone over at my house because I had beer bottles all over. I knew I was at rock bottom but I didn't know what to do. I started praying to God to introduce someone to me that could help me. I did this for a long time. Finally, out of nowhere God introduced me to my girlfriend. We've been seeing eachother for only two and a half months. At the start I still drank but not as much. Lately I've found myself not wanting alcohol at all. She gave me a reason to quit. And I have God to thank for it. Please believe that God hears you. Be patient. It took quite a while for God to answer my prayers, but he did. I also believe that if God didn't care about you, he wouldn't have all these wonderful people trying to help you through your pain. It's God working through others, just as he did through my girlfriend. Trust in him and believe in him. He is here for you.
 
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whatisage responded:
renetta34. I know what it is like to be molested at a young age. I was by a pervert at 13. God has helped me to forgive that person and move on. I was a homeless drunken bum that didn't care for myself let alone anybody else. When I felt I just couldn't take no more, I was homeless in the desert out side of Tucson Arizona. I fell to my knees and asked the Lord to let me die or take over control of my life and help me. I was 38 years old and death seemed the only way out. I have seen God help me when I was younger but it was like he had left me and I had no where to turn. I found out God never left me. I walked away from Him. Sweetheart, You are a child of God even if you don't feel it. One way God is using you right now, is by your post. He wants you to look to Him. Your post says you believe in Him. Keep praying and we will to. You may not see it right now but you are helping others also. Your posts even if they are about you needing help, helps others by getting them to think about you instead of them self. Rennetta34 We need you. You need us, and we all need Jesus. God uses these boards to talk to us through other people. We need to hear what God says through you. I enjoy reading the Bible and other Books that help explain what the Bible is saying. You can find books on Christian web sites that are free and they help with understanding the Bible. Christian radio stations have call in counseling shows that is a big help. Over the last 10 years God has picked me up off the desert floor, and has blessed me more ways than I can count. God is there for you and so are we. The people of this board and the angels in Heaven know you are a sister in Christ and we love you and care for you. Keep coming back here, and watch God work in your life as you try to help others from your past experiences. Use your past to help others and God will make miracles happen for you and others.

Your brother in Christ whatisage
 
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Grace1122 responded:
Hi Renetta34,

I pray today is a better day for you.

I can't say that I completely understand what you are going through, but I feel like I just can't live the life that God has intended for me to live. I'm not happy and I don't think I've ever been and it's hard to find happiness because I don't really know myself.

When I'm really feeling down, I say that I don't mind dying and going to be with God. I want you to know that hell is not an option. I think it will be unfathomably worse than anything we may experience here on earth.

A part of me (most of me) wants to hold on and wait for God to show me his glory. I know that He can heal all wounds. When we're feeling down, I think we unconsciously move away from God, but I think what we should do is fight harder to be closer to Him. Once we establish an intimate relationship with Him, I believe that's when we'll start seeing changes.
 
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Lukeperry responded:
Renetta,
I'm sorry that you've had such a terrible life. You still love God, but your mad at him for not saving you. Child abuse is so rampant, that there has got to be a good reason for it. One that we aren't going to find out until we die. One thing for sure, God's not doing it, so your anger is misplaced.
You can't rely on the leaders of the Church, teacher's, or any of those people. (half of them are doing it themselves) They don't want to get involved in such an ugly subject. You are the only one that you can rely on, with this subject. Parent's of abused children will know about it,(sometimes it's one of the parents) and not tell the authorities, because they don't want the rest of the family, friends, and the police to know such a dirty thing is going on. And they are so stupid that they really do believe, that a child won't remember or be hurt by it!
The reason I keep using the word dirty, is because that's the way it was put to me, when I tried to save a child that was being molested by telling her parents. They preferred to ignore it.
People are the ones who hurt us!(not God) He's the one who will save us.
He hasn't let me know why he allows abuse to happen, but he has put a feeling in my heart, letting me know he has a good reason. It could be so those people will go to hell, or to see how we handle it, or to see how the people who didn't protect us(after we told) handle it. All I know is there is a good reason.
Bad things are always going to happen, amputated legs, MS, depression, parents getting murdered. God isn't making these things happen, but he will get you out of it. If you tell him that your mad at him, and will he please take that anger for him out of your heart, he will. It might take a few days, but he will do it. You know how he has his own time table and it never matches ours! He might be testing you, I don't know.
You need to contact the person who hurt you, take somebody with you and go to his house. Tell him that you are telling everybody, even the police. Shake him up a little. Let me warn you, he's going to deny it, so be ready for that. It doesn't matter, yell at the bastard "Everybody knows!" That will bother him more then anything. And when you leave, I guarantee you that a 10 ton weight will be lifted from your shoulders! And a lot of hate will be gone also.
Call the child abuse hotline before you go, (i did it when I was 31) They are so nice, and the lady will even go to his house and shake him up.(if you want her to) Telling them is a great weight lifter also. Go back to God, so he can be back with you. He will give you the strength that your needing right now. We leave God, he never leaves us.(NEVER) He is just waiting for you to come back, because he misses you. God bless you, and I will pray for you tonight.
P.S. You do not want to go to hell, because guess who you'll run right smack dab into? Him for eternity!

Luke


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