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kadourii posted:
My mother had her second stroke at the beginning of March and it was on the left side of the brain which affects speech and reasoning and understanding. She is now living with me and it is very hard due to the fact that nomatter how patient or sweet i am, she randomly tells me i am so frustrated and angry with her-when i am not. She also tells me im always asking what is she doing, and that its never enough for me. I am a very laid back person who loves my mother greatly, i just keep trying to explain to her her perceptions off-to no avail.

Will her perception ever balance out again? She is 69 years old and when she was younger battled with being bi polar. I do my best to understand and work with her, its just so hard when you live with a person who no matter what you do, is so involved with where they are and creates you to be the bad guy when you are the only true support and care giver.

I am tired of being made to feel like im the bad guy yet i have altered my entire life for her, im tired and angry, hurt and sad, and want to give up yet i know its not an option. This is the first time ive posted any discussion about this and i just need help, i just need someone to give me away to handle the madness without being pulled into an unbalanced place.

Do alot of family memebers go through this? Does it get better? I know we cant time it, but can anyone guess how long? And is part of the issues possiably due to her age?

Thank you
itmatsb responded:
If your mother's stroke was on the left side, the only behavioral effect that I see on-line is a slow and cautious behavioral style. It more typically results in speech difficulties called aphasia, memory loss and paralysis or weakness on the right side of the body. No mention of reasoning difficulties.

Whereas strokes on the right side of the brain can result in a sudden change in behavior and judgment difficulties that show up in their behavioral styles. These patients often develop an impulsive style unaware of their impairments.

So if you did get the correct side of the brain, your mother's behavior may instead be from her bipolar background which could maybe get corrected with medication. Wouldn't that be better than from her stroke? Or she may have some alzheimers.

I had a major stroke and didn't have any behavioral changes but did have aphasia (now gone) and permanent disability on my right side.

You will have to separate emotionally from your mother enough to not take any of her behavior personally. Know that it is from a mental disability. And for your own sanity you may have to have her live somewhere else. I couldn't take it. Good luck.

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