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    Suicide attempts if not under the influence
    avatar
    An_227141 posted:
    I haven't had the roughest life, so I am not blaming my past for my addiction, but far from a good past. I have wanted to escape from everything ever since I can remember, more and more thoughts of worthlessness has crowded my thoughts. Once I began doing drugs of pretty much any form I lost all control, I can not go very long without narcotics or street drugs and when looking at the future if i feel i will not have narcotics I consider suicide. These thoughts now have gotten to the point that I will do anything for narcotics just to make myself stop thinking. The only thing I can focus on is drugs and how I can get more, and occasionally I can think about other non-related drug subjects. I need help, I don't know if i have convinced myself of illness of the mind I may have to the point of getting them and making others believe I need them or if I really do need them. I'm scared for my life i get worse every day now, it used to be every year now it's days...please give me a number to call or something to help me I know I'll end up on horrible drugs soon if not helped
    Reply
     
    avatar
    Caprice_WebMD_Staff responded:
    Hi and welcome to WebMD,

    I'm sure one of our experts will be responding but that may take a bit of time.

    In the meantime, click here for some addiction phone numbers to call. They may be able to at least help you keep your head above water until one of our experts can offer some guidance.

    Have you ever been in therapy to work on the issues that have lead to your coping with drugs?

    Please take care and keep yourself safe.
     
    avatar
    Betty Ford Center
    Sean Barlow, MD responded:
    The demoralized place you find yourself in is common to both drug use and depression. Also, it is very dangerous, especially given your thoughts of suicide. I would recommend you see your primary care or family physician as soon as possible and discuss these concerns. Ultimately you probably should see a specialist in mental health issues i.e. a psychiatrist - hopefully one who also understands drug use. If you don't have a personal physician, then most counties have mental health departments that will evaluate you and give you options. Just a reminder that there is help and hope for both depression and loss of control over drugs—don't give up on finding solutions!
     
    avatar
    TDXSP08 responded:
    ANON

    I just want to caution you though i have never been addicted to drugs but for a period of my life i really wanted "out of it" as in death i had been seriously abused as a child and felt my whole life was just a throwaway that no one would miss. I was wrong after a very serious attempt friends and things popped out of the woodwork and came to me all with the same ?? "why didn't you call me" but this is about you and the thing i learned after my first attempt which i am hoping to prevent in you and that is : after you make a first attempt if you survive it suicide attempts become easier and easier with taking less thought than taking the garbage out on the corre ct night, so please do not let yourself go there its ugly and lonely and will hurt more, my email is in my story click on my name if you need someone to talk to who understands, i will listen and obviously not judge as i have been there.

    Peace


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