Substance Abuse Community

I grew up with an alcoholic father, and it caused a lot of heartache for our family. Even now that I've grown up and it's been so long, I am still struggling with what I went through back then. I had to grow up real fast and have seen things that no person should ever have to see. I used to be terrified when someone even cracked a beer; terrified of alcohol in general because of my dad. I realize now that not everybody drinks like that and that you can enjoy a drink without being a raging alcoholic.

My husband also grew up with parents who like to drink, and they've only gotten worse since all their kids grew up and moved out. Luckily though, his experience was no where near as bad as mine was. But still, I worry about my husband. He's a beer drinker. He comes home everyday and has a few beers throughout the evening. I have a hard time with this sometimes, but he tells me that he's coming straight home everyday. He doesn't go to the bar or stay out all night. He's not drinking enough to get drunk either. He's not abusive. He goes to work everyday...etc. He just enjoys a few beers after a long day at work. He's always assured me that it wasn't a big deal.

We were highschool sweethearts, so we've been together for a long time. When we were younger and just starting to drink, my husband realized quickly that whiskey wasn't his friend. When he drinks that stuff he starts to get angry. He would never touch me or hurt me, but he would be unpleasant and pick a fight and just wouldn't stop. So I told him I wouldn't put up with that and that he couldn't drink it anymore. In fact he very rarely drinks any hard alcohol at all because he doesn't like what it does to him.

Lately though, it seems like he's been drinking more than usual. It seems like we're spending more money on beer than we should be. I think because he's had a lot of added stress, he's been drinking more. And when he's had a little too much he gets that same way. He gets upset more easily, it seems like he's looking for a fight, and nothing you say is right. He just doesn't quit ranting and he becomes obnoxious. I don't even know how to explain it. But I finally said some things to him that he needed to hear, and I let him know that I won't stay with him if this was how it was going to be. I can only take so much. He admitted to me that he has a problem and needs my help. I'm kind of scared. I don't know what to do. Since our talk though he hasn't drank at all. He doesn't want to be like that. I think he should save the drinking for the weekends only, so I think he's going to try. I just don't know what I can do to help. My dad went through all the bells and whistles and nothing ever helped him.