Trying to Conceive: 6 Months, Still Trying Community

I will be 31 in Sept. and have been trying since last Spring. I've been married over 7 years and have been on the pill ever since. I got off the pill last March and haven't had any luck as of yet. I went to my gyno earlier this month and he put me on Femara to help me ovulate. He said he didn't want to wait any longer since I'm 30. He felt very positive that this would give us positive results the first month. But then again, he felt sure I would be pregnant by now because I have a history of normal periods that came like clockwork (before I started the pill and after being on the pill several years). My first period after I quit taking the pill was pretty rough, but everyone after that has been "normal", meaning I have been on a 28-32 day cycle. But some months I was so sick, I could hardly function and other months I wouldn't feel like I was even on my period. It was weird. I don't remember ever feeling that way before I got on the pill. And last month, my period came 5 days early! Which is very odd. I think I can remember that only happening once about 10 years ago. I say all of that to make a point. I know all the doctors I've talked to say that conception issues aren't caused by taking birth control in the past. But my problem is, I've heard so many stories about women having issues TTC after getting off the pill. I understand you have a different level to your issue since you have had dramatic weight loss. But if I were you, I would try and get a 2nd opinion. You having to gain 30 lbs is a ridiculous answer from your doctor. I mean, go from being healthy to being borderline unhealthy (in the eyes of a doctor) just to have a baby? A Dr. can make a mistake and sometimes their "professional opinions" aren't alway correct. Best of luck to you!

I hope everything works out for you!!
I'm going to get a second opinion for sure. My hubby is constantly berating BC on a daily basis now--he says it is the cause of all of this (I had normal periods prior too). I need a doctor that will do an ultrasound or sonogram or whatever they can do to make sure there's not a fibroid/tumor/mass or something else that could be affecting me internally. I hate the way drs nowadays just remedy everything with a pill instead of trying to get to the "root" of the problem. Please keep me updated on your journey and I'll do the same with you!!

Thank you! And I hope everything works out for you too! Yes, I will try and keep you posted. According to my calendar, AF will start Sunday. I'm feeling all the signs of typical AF, so I would not be surprised if not pregnant this time around. I've just noticed a lot of things going on and have tons of questions for my doctor. Like, my left ovaries were killing me this past month after my first round of Femara. But then again, the month before that the left side was hurting. So, it's strange that it's happened two months in a row. I don't always hurt like that during ovulation. And I'm just assuming it's ovulation and not a cyst or something completely different. And as for the pill, I hate it! I will never use it again, b/c it's so easy to determine when fertile! I would never tell someone to use the pill or patch or anything b/c it might cause issues down the road. That might be a little crazy, but I've just heard too many women having issues TTC. I know it's not all women of course, but there are too many issues to deny it might be an issue for some women. I think the BC companies have too much at stake to warn women they might have a conception problem down the road, if they where to put a warning on the label. So my therory is: they're making a killing off of BC prescriptions and making a tons off of women's infertility issues. Sorry for my rant. I took at early pregnancy test this morning and it came back negative so I am a little discouraged this AM. Keep me posted on the latest!

Hi!,
I hope all is well with you. I'm still on my "journey" it would seem I saw the RE and he did all kinds of blood tests, transvaginal ultrasound and even the HSSG (where they run dye through your fallopian tubes OUCH) and all came back normal. He said he could see eggs, and all my blood tests were good. My hubby provided a semen sample, and sadly, his sperm count is low. As of right now our only options are IVF and sperm donor My hubby has an appt w/ a urologist TODAY to make sure there's nothing wrong with him. My doc said there was no medical reason as to why I wasn't having a period--weird huh? Like my brain is telling my body NOT to ovulate?? Anyway, I hope you're havin better luck than me.

take care,
Lyn

Hi! Sorry it's taken so long for me to respond. I'm sorry to hear things haven't worked out so far. We still haven't had positive results yet. I've got an appt. with my Dr. this Thursday to discuss a procedure to make sure there isn't a blockage in my tubes and to get my hubby checked out as well. It sounds like I'll be having the same test that you did with the dye. It doesn't look like something I'll be looking forward to! Oh well, It's just something that I'll have to endure. The last 3 months taking Femara did not go well. It make me crazy in ways I didn't even know existed. One night I held up in the bedroom and cried, for no reason, for about an hour. It was pitiful! We discussed it and have decided not to take any more meds bc it's just not worth it. Some women are just more well equipped to handle these type of things and I'm just not one of them. Like I don't see myself going the IVF route either. If the Dr. tells me that we cannot have children without something like IVF, we'll just adopt later on. I've prayed about it and believe the Lord is telling us to wait. For some reason, it's just not our time to have children and I certainly don't want to rush it. It's just human nature to want what you want right now! But I need to be patient and know that all things happen for a reason. And too, there is a time to every purpose under heaven. BTW, I charted my BBT and CM the last 2 months and can only pinpoint one month of ovulation. This last month I don't have evidence that I ovulated, which is a tough pill to swallow. All of this charting and worrying is taking away what little joy I had in this process. We broke down and told all of our parents, just so that nobody will ask. Since I'll be 31 later this year and my hubby is 34...people are bound to ask why we haven't started a family yet. I figure it's best for us to tell them now, so that I won't start crying if someone brings it up later on. I just need to let go and let God handle it, bc I can't anymore. I'm just so tired of worrying. Sorry, for the venting and complaining and going on and on. I know a lot of us say the same things over and over, but it's good to have others to talk to who know exaclty what you're going through.
Take Care and let me know how it's going,

Tara

Hi Tara,
I feel exactly as you do. I've told my hubby that if we can't get pregnant he is to pay for me to have my boobs done! I say that like that will make me feel better?!?
Anyway, we had another semen analysis done and this time it came back at 29 million!! Very good news. I called my gyno to see if we could do a higher dosage of clomid and she told me that it was "out of her hands" since I had gone to see the RE. She said his recommendation was either "gonadatropin" or "genotropin"---I couldn't hear her clear enough--which is bad because the first one is for men with low sperm counts and the second one is human growth hormone! I'm very confused because the RE initially (before getting 1st semen analysis back) said that I'd have no problem getting preggers on a higher dose of Clomid. I've called the RE's office and OF COURSE had to leave a message--so I'm just waiting on them to call back.
It's so frustrating, especially when I see my friends preparing to become mother's. My best friend recently went off of BC and had her first period like clockwork (if you remember, I've not had a period since stopping BC). Another friend is getting a bigger car in preparation for motherhood.
My husband and I've talked and at this point (who knows how we'll feel in 5 years) IVF just isn't financially worth it. It costs a lot of money and my feeling on it is that we'd spend ALL of this money trying to get pregnant, get pregnant and then have NO money to support the child!! I just don't want to bring a child into the world and not be able to give it everything that I had and more. Don't get me wrong, we're both fairly successful in our careers--but I just don't want to blow through savings and then have something happen to one of us.
Guess I'm venting too huh? I'm so sorry you're having a rough time. I am very glad though, that I've found someone to talk to as I know NO ONE that is going through what we are. I hope you have a great week

I don't want to be rude, but I have been trying for almost 2 years and would do ANYTHING to get a baby. I have spend tons of money with the whole ttc thing and would gladly do IVF if that is what will give me a baby. If you aren't willing to put the money forth then maybe you need to reconsider the whole baby thing!!!!

ATT76--perhaps I wasn't clear in my conversation with Tara, I am of the mind that if I have children I want to give them everything I can, I do not want to spend all of my money on ttc only to have to get food stamps or assistance once we have a child. I don't think it's fair (and AGAIN, my thought process could CERTAINLY change) to selfishly bring a child into this world and then NOT be able to give him/her a comfortable life. That is all that I meant. I am very sorry that you have not been able to conceive, it's an awful feeling and we've only been ttc for 1 year. I wish you all the luck and I will be praying for you ATT76.

I understand and agree that ttc is expensive and you want to give your child everything they deserve. I am not saying you should be on food stamps or on welfare. I am a firm believer of NOT being on those assistances. DH and I have worked hard to be able to afford ttc and still be able to give our child what they need.

When I read your post it just hit me the wrong way. I did not mean to jump on you about your decisions, but after trying for so long it really gets to me!

You know I got thinking again as to why Iwas so upset about your post and after talking to a friend about it, I figured it out. The mention of having a boob job if the kid thing doesn't work out seems selfish! Whether it was said as a joke or not it just seems disrespectful...to ALL women who are ttc! Good luck!

I understand that, but if you read the comment after that: "I say that like THAT will make me feel better"--everyone copes with things differently. I would never want to be disrespectful to anyone, but I'm trying to figure things out/cope like everyone else. I tend to keep most of my emotions on the inside and only those very close to me get to see them. I don't like sympathy and attention when it's geared towards me, so sometimes I blow things off as if they're "no big deal". I know and you know it IS a big deal. I'm sorry if I offended you or anyone else, never my intention.

TTC is hard and everyone does cope differently. I guess I just didn't like the comment and thought I would express my opinion. TTC is a big deal and very hard...no matter how long you have been trying.

Hi! I didn't even see your last reply til today when I saw all the other conversation. Well, I had the HSG done about a week ago and everything was clear. I just got results from hubby's test and it says it's within normal limits. My clinic hasn't gotten the official paperwork yet, so that's all the info they could give me. I hope they mail something official out with more info. But not sure what more they could tell us. My OB only wants me to start the first month of Clomid if hubby's test comes back good. So, I guess I'll be starting that in July. I didn't like the Femara I was on at all. It gave me severe mood swings, hot flashes and I cried all the time for no reason. I talked to a friend that had taken Clomid and she said she didn't experience any bad side affects, so I'm hoping it's not as bad as Femara. So, with all the positive news, I have regained some hope. I believe everything happens for a reason and I know it just might not be our time to get pregnant. We've done everything right and waited to have a baby in order to have a finances in good order. But sometimes, you can plan all you want but it still might not be time to start a family...even though all of us feel ready. It's tough I know. Nobody understands the struggle like we do. Our main goal in having all of these tests done was to see if we could even have a baby on our own. If they say we can't, then we want to take the path to adoption. Our insurance will only cover the diagnosis of the condition, not the treatment. So, we cannot afford to do IVF, nor do I want to. Personally, I'd rather jump to adoption. But that's such a personal decision that I know everyone feels differently about it. My main reason for not doing IVF is there is no guarantee it will work and there you would have spent all that money. This is just a personal decision, and every couple has to do what is best for them and their situation.
Let me know what you found out about the meds, if it was for you or the hubs. I found out a friend was pregnant back in April. That was a tough one for me. I agree, it's so nice to have someone to talk to and a place to vent. I just think I've come to a place on this journey where if i can't get pregnant, it's not the end of my world. We'll just have to wait and see where the journey takes us...
I hope everything is going well for you guys and wish you the best! I hope you're having a wonderful week!
TTYL

well that sounds promising! I'm very happy for you!! I just took the last two clomid doses this morning and will go back to the RE on Monday to do another transvaginal ultrasound, then I have to pick up a dose of Ovidrel (it's a shot that's injected into my stomach to speed ovulation? I think). This is all foreign to me, I just rely on what the doctor says, anyway, after the shot we have two choices, IUI or trying to conceive thru intercourse. I'm torn, on one hand IUI seems like it's a better chance of sperm and egg meeting, but my hubby really wants us to try to do it the "old-fashioned" way first. I'm okay with that, however, if it doesn't work then I'll have to do ANOTHER round of Provera for a period and ANOTHER round of Clomid and I think they only give you 6 rounds and that'll be my 3rd. Anywho, seems like we're both headed in the right direction! Best of luck to you and yours and, who knows, maybe next time we post it'll be a baby announcement!!