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l8dsheena posted:
My mom came over to talk to me this morning because she said my family was worried about me...basically she's worried that I'm not getting over my loss. I'm not sure if it was a very fruitful conversation, but it was a little comforting knowing my whole family is praying for me. She told me my sister's pregnant, due in December. I kinda knew, its one of those feelings, like a feeling of panic when you know something bad is going to happen.
At this point I'm just numb inside. I wish the whole stupid pregnant world would just leave me be. I want to believe it will be my turn next. But it's so hard when it happens to everyone else but me.
Please, please pray that I can at least make it through this day.
Myself (Katie, 29) and DH(31) Praying and trying for a 4th child for 3.5 years. 1 missed m/c @ 17 weeks, D/C 3 weeks later on 5/11/12.
As Aragorn says, there's always hope.
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ani05 responded:
(((HUGS))) Katie! So sorry that you are having a difficult day. I don't think people understand it's not that easy to get over a pregnancy loss. I think they expect you to get over it the next day, they don't know it never goes away and every pregnant women that you see it reminds you of your loss. Hopefully you feel better soon.
Ani(31),DH(31),DD(6),Furbaby(3).TTC for baby no.2 since 05/2009.BFP on 03/02/2011,M/C on 03/11/2011.BFP on 04/12/2012,M/C on 05/02/2012.
 
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l8dsheena replied to ani05's response:
thanks Ani..I just wish people werent so puzzled as to why I always feel this way. Especially this sister, she's always telling me to "just be happy", but in her hoity toity philisophical words that sound like CS Lewis but with less experience and understanding of what she's actually saying. She's never known the grief of losing a child after trying so long...she doesn't know what its like to just try to keep it together when you know it might take another year or two to get pregnant again. She's so blissfully ignorant of any hardships a mother has to accept when they become mothers.
I just want this to end, I just can't do this anymore. I just want to feel better!!
Myself (Katie, 29) and DH(31) Praying and trying for a 4th child for 3.5 years. 1 missed m/c @ 17 weeks, D/C 3 weeks later on 5/11/12.
As Aragorn says, there's always hope.
 
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l8dsheena replied to l8dsheena's response:
alright, I feel better today. I'm not letting this get to me. This STOPS right now. What happens to others shouldn't affect me. This is stupid, and I'm not going to feel sorry for myself this time. I'm just going to keep going, because what else can I do, right??
ONWARD!!!
Myself (Katie, 29) and DH(31) Praying and trying for a 4th child for 3.5 years. 1 missed m/c @ 17 weeks, D/C 3 weeks later on 5/11/12.
As Aragorn says, there's always hope.
 
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ani05 replied to l8dsheena's response:
Yes,exactly,don't let it affect you.
If you remember a little while ago I learned that my SIL was expecting her third child that she doesn't want and of course I got upset,especially with her attitude about having another baby and knowing that I have had two miscarriages and trying for 4 yrs.
Anyway,I decided that it wasn't going to affect me and moved on.Now I don't think about it much,probably until she gives birth and lives her child not taken care of but that's later and I am preparing myself for it.
Sorry,I think I made it worse for you and didn't help at all.
Ani(31),DH(31),DD(6),Furbaby(3).TTC for baby no.2 since 05/2009.BFP on 03/02/2011,M/C on 03/11/2011.BFP on 04/12/2012,M/C on 05/02/2012.
 
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l8dsheena replied to ani05's response:
nah, that's fine...people like that need a strong dose of reality, I hope it comes to her in full force one of these days.
I'm not worried about my sister though, shes a good mom...in fact she's the "perfect one" of the family, everything being handed to her, never any real hardships to go through, and everyone loves her.
I'm just sick of being paranoid and desperate. writing it, saying it out loud, is the first step towards getting out of this big funk.
I'm going to feel good today, dammit! lol
Myself (Katie, 29) and DH(31) Praying and trying for a 4th child for 3.5 years. 1 missed m/c @ 17 weeks, D/C 3 weeks later on 5/11/12.
As Aragorn says, there's always hope.
 
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vybe77 replied to l8dsheena's response:
(((hugs))) Katie I'm so sorry you have all this stuff around you that keeps jabbing at you in your time of hardship...I know it's hard knowing others are pregnant when all we want is to be the same way too...tell yourself there's a reason why it hasn't yet been your turn and someday you'll understand why...
It doesn't make anything any easier right now but I know that someday we will all understand the bigger picture..
I do like the new attitude and the trick is to take in one day at a time and do like you're doing..lwtting this one day be a good one and then you can deal with the next one tomorrow..and so on..I just wish it wasn't hard for all of us though..
(((hugs))) girl xo
Let life be a journey of love
Emily, Kody, Maxim xo


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