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    i need a friend who understands this disease
    suites posted:
    hello my name is paddy i am from dublin wife Breda has being going through alzheimer's now for 7 years that i know of.I care for her at home and sometimes I envy people who have alzheimer's and are going through the trauma in slow stages. I do not mean that in any perverse or disrespectful way i have the greatest respect and sympathy for them. Its just that Breda was diagnosed as having early onset alzheimer's and was put on medication from day one ,aricept, risperdal, ebixa, and after about 4 weeks it was like as if someone turned out the light on our life Breda became very tired and sleepy almost zombiest and began to need to be fed clothed and bathed with assistance . Breda also became totally incontinent doubly so. Breda has suffered 4 toxic clonic seizures over the past 12 months and was hospitalised each time. Before these seizures Breda would not sleep and became very agitated not aggressive but very agitated like a person in very bad pain . I would call out the doctor and he would say its the disease and not prescribe any meds to help this condition can anyone here please help me to understand this problem please thank you in advance.
    cjh1203 replied to suites's response:
    Paddy, how awful that your efforts to help Breda are met with such indifference. Dealing with Alzheimer's is difficult enough without having to beg random doctors for help.

    I'm really glad that you found someone with enough compassion to check on Breda and try to help her. Did she seem better after getting the morphine patch? It's really good that the doctor also offered to help you with her meds on Monday.

    I think I mentioned this before -- whenever you have a question about meds, a pharmacist can be a great help. My aunt was recently given two prescriptions for my uncle (who has dementia). Trusting the doctor, she went to get them filled and the pharmacist told her they were very inappropriate for someone in my uncle's condition (and they were -- they could have caused some nasty side effects). Pharmacists often know more than doctors when it comes to medications and they can be a very useful resource.

    Please let us know how Breda is doing tomorrow. I hope the patch has made a big difference.
    hcp28 responded:
    Hi Paddy,

    It's all the symptoms of the Alzheimer's. Every Alzheimer's face these type of situations. Memory Loss, angry, fear are the most common symptoms seen in Alzheimer's. You should consult a Alzheimer's specialist for treatment of your wife or you can take help of a care home or nursing home that provides services for dementia affected persons. Don't need to be worried too much, follow doctor's prescription properly and take care of some things, have patience in front of your wife, behave very politely with her and support them in performing routine activities or take help of a carer for her.

    If proper care is given to the Alzheimer's, they can live a healthy and long life.
    suites replied to cjh1203's response:
    Thanks cjh1203 the patch seems to be settling Breda also she is on a new drug so hopefully things will settle I will keep you up to date. I have not seen Breda for the past 5 days as I am laid low with the Flu . P/S sorry I took so long to reply. Paddy
    suites replied to hcp28's response:
    thank you for replying I will take on board all that advice once again thank you. Paddy
    Byroney_WebMD_Staff replied to suites's response:
    Dear Paddy,

    I know this note wasn't to me, but I just wanted to pop in and say I was pleased to hear Breda was settling.

    I'm so sorry you've been struck down with the flu. I hope you're resting, drinking fluids, and following your doctor's advice and most of all--starting to feel better.

    We're all pulling for you and Breda,

    cjh1203 replied to suites's response:
    Paddy, I'm sorry you've been under the weather. I know it must be hard for you not to see Breda for such a long stretch. It's good to hear, though, that the new drug seems to be helping so much, and I hope that continues.
    suites replied to cjh1203's response:
    thank you i will update soon . paddy
    fallingwater72 replied to cjh1203's response:
    Doctors can tend to be so cold when it comes to longterm treatment sometimes...well, a lot of times... Don't ever stop being active in your wife's treatments and her medications. Please whatever you do, do NOT let them prescribe seroquel to her again. On the website for the makers of seroquel you will find where it repeatedly states to NEVER give that to a patient with dementia or alzheimer's as it has been reported to conrtibute to sudden death in patients. It's been reported that the heart will suddenly stop beating for some dementia/alzheimer's patients taking this medication. It is BLACK BOXED or Black Labeled or whatever they call it for these types of patients. Of course I am in the US and not sure it its the same where u are living. My mother in law was given it and I reasearched her meds and found this info. Immediately we stopped giving it to her and called her doctor.
    I hope Breda is having a better day. she has a wonderful husband who is taking wonderful care of her, others are not so lucky and tend to "fall thru the cracks" God bless you and her!
    Treceelou responded:
    My name is Theresa and I am from Ohio, I am not a Dr or nurse but I have been taking care of my mom for 7 mo. now,before me she was with my sister for 3 years,all she did at my sisters was sleep day and night and always looked druged, she was on aricept and while on them she dreamed bad dreams and thought people were in and outsids windows,in graves it was bad,The Dr did take her off of that,all went away.She was on risperdal 2-3 a night she looked drugged when she got up in the morning,her mouth hang open and all she did all day was sleep.She wentto hospital with chf and then to nursing home,after 3 mo sister says no more and wanted to leave her there,I got her home with me and after a Dr viisit I not him took her down to 1 respirdal a night,she is so much better,doesn't sleep all day uses a walker comes to table to eat,I take her to K-mart and to my sisters to visit, she is still on depends but can go to bathroom to change herself,we are going today to get her hair colored and cut,she will be 81 the 27th of this month,not saying it's easy still has sundowning in the evening and most nights I am someother Theresa,she has Theresa her daughter (me) and a Theresa that takes care of her which is still me but to her it's not) When Mom gets a little agitated Dr said to give her a.5 nerve pill,I probably did help you much but it feels good to just vent to someone who also knows ,with prayers to you andBreda,Theresa
    2010guardian replied to Treceelou's response:
    I can relate to you when you talk about your Mom being drugged.
    My sister was on a lot of medicine and it would build up in her system and she would stare and her mouth would drop open.Her daughter was a nurse and would take her off some of the medicine for a few days and then start her back on it. She had a mental illness. Dropping back on dosage helps to 'unload' the system. I'm happy to hear that your mother is much improved. What a Blessing!

    wharlacher responded:
    Hello Paddy,
    I am so sorry to hear about your wife having alzheimer's. My mother was just recently diagnosed with it and she is only 65 years old. It is so heartbreaking to watch someone you love so much slowly slip away so my thoughts and prayers to out to you and your wife. My mother is being treated with medication and we to feel that the doctors are really not listening to what my father is telling them about her symptoms. Her terrible language, and agitation. My father is really struggling because she wants to be with him 24/7 and sometimes becomes very angry at him for no reason. I'm hoping that the doctors can prescribe something to help with the outburst and anger that she has. I do hope that wife is soon released from the hospital and home with you and keep on doing what you are doing by being at her side. Somewhere inside of her she realizes what your doing for her.
    cjh1203 replied to wharlacher's response:
    Hi Wharlacher.

    Paddy hasn't posted for a couple of years, unfortunately.

    I'm terribly sorry about your mother's diagnosis -- she's only five years older than I am. It's hard to imagine much more devastating news for a family than Alzheimer's.

    You're right -- it's just awful to see someone you love lose all the things that made her, her.

    The symptoms you're describing seem to happen to pretty much everyone with Alzheimer's, and it's so hard to see and deal with. There are medications that should be able to help with her agitation. Does her doctor care for a lot of Alzheimer's patients? If you don't think he/she is listening, maybe it would be good to find another doctor.

    Music can also be effective in soothing agitation in some Alzheimer's patients.

    Have you looked into joining and Alzheimer's Association support group locally?

    I hope you'll stay in touch and let us know how things are going.

    Take care.

    Judith L London, PhD responded:
    Hi Paddy,

    Sorry it took so long to respond. First of all, we all salute you for the care you give to Breda - it is truly remarkable.

    Secondly, please do arrange for some relief as soon as possible - there must be friends or community organizations to help out, or if you can afford it, hire someone. The earlier you do that, the better it will be.

    Next, do try to get an accurate diagnosis. Have physical causes been ruled out? Sudden changes that imitate dementia often occur when the body fights illness. Have a geriatric neurologist evaluate her. Although I am a psychologist and not a medical doctor, in my experience, some of the drugs you mentioned such as Haldol are not given to people with tremors. However, some of the other drugs may help.

    The inability to communicate is one of the major reasons people with Alzheimer's get agitated. Here are some ways you can help Breda calm down: soft music that she has enjoyed in the past, using lotions with lemon or lavender which calm the brain centers, telling her that you understand how confusing and frustrating it must be for her, reassuring her that you are there for her, showing her photographs of places she has liked, explaining things to her in a calm, tone - anything that would probably help you if you were experiencing her situation.

    Do keep writing to us,

    An_263196 responded:
    Hi I know what your are going through I live with my mother and father in law 88 and 89 mom has stage 7 alheimer's and he has dimnetia she has a mild stroke causing blood on the brain she has really change she was sweet smiling laughing but now she is so agitated can't say or do anything to calm her down she can't walk feed herself etc. But she will try and stand I go to help her and she will push me away and I don't want her to fall I'm at a loss when she goes to bed she doesn't rest she wiggles and like talks in her sleep This is so hard because its not the same person anymore I got use to the not knowing who I really am but she seemed to know I was there to help and now ??? Doctors are telling me the same thing its the disease she on all the meds that can help What do we do
    cjh1203 replied to An_263196's response:
    Hello. I'm so sorry you're going through such a distressing time.

    The last post on this thread was three years ago, and most of the people are long gone from this board. I will respond to you on your other post.


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