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    Who Understands You?
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    Chris_WebMD_Staff posted:
    Who supports you the most when you find yourself struggling with Bipolar?
    Do you have someone you can lean on, someone that understands you best?
    We all need someone to count on, lean on, who is there for you?
    Chrissy~

    Life is too short, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
    Author Unknown
     
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    bpcookie replied to dinnfire's response:
    aaaawww Your welcome honey. You know that you can talk to me about anything. Love you
    After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, No hablo ingles.
     
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    lueetta responded:
    don't even know actually. i mean i think or thought i could say my friend of 30 years but she's saying negative things like, "you're crazy" and it doesn't feel good. i do have other friends but i get the feeling like they feel they have to walk on egg shells around me and it's not what i want.
     
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    bp_roller replied to lueetta's response:
    Nobody, not even myselves....
     
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    Torcal replied to billy456's response:
    I assume your brother is not insured. Every state and many counties have departments of mental health. Do some Internet research. I just did a quick one using the terms "bipolar services" and ended up with pages of state agencies and hospitals that deal with bipolar disorder. When you do it add the name of your state; i.e., "Wisconsin bipolar disorder services". He can tell them his circumstances and ask where he can get help. He can also call private psychiatric hospitals and ask the same question. And if he can't call you can do it on his behalf.

    If drugs are required and he is not insured many pharma companies have programs where indigent people can get drugs deeply discounted.

    Check the Internet to see if there are any medical studies on bipolar disorder that he can participate in.

    Local psychiatrists in his area may be aware of treatment opportunities not generally known to the public. Call and ask every one. Maybe one will even take on your brother as a public service.
     
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    Torcal responded:
    The answer is no one except, perhaps, my psychiatrist. But no one except another victim has any real understanding of what it's like to swing from attempted suicide to buying a car one can't afford. Before I knew what my real problem is I self-medicated with alcohol, lived like a raving alcoholic for over ten years, went through two recovery programs and then continued drinking until I couldn't live with myself and then somehow managed to quit. Although I felt physically better as my body began to heal I started to experience full blown manic depression. I spent over $60K on shrinks cognative therapy and minor doses of anti-depressants. When it got to the point that I couldn't remember where I was and got lost going to the doctor's office, the shrink I was then seeing finally figured out that I was severely bipolar (among other things) and wrote me out of life as permanently disabled. Social Security agreed and I've been totally disabled since I was fifty-five. I'm now sixty-four and male, by the way.

    I'm now calmed down, take Wellbutrin, Lamictal and Diazepam and Dexedrine for use when I start to go off the deep end one way or the other. I can't sleep without 30 mg of of Temazepam and 100 mg. of Trazadone and even then I get about six hours' sleep at the most.

    I've been to thousands of hours of AA meetings, alcohol counseling and psychological/psychiatric treatment. I now see my psychiatrist every three months or so when I need prescription refills.

    When my parents were alive they wouldn't listen to anything I had to say about my "problems". People who were born in 1916 didn't have problems other than the results of the Depression. They just asked me when I intended to get a job.

    Virtually all of my business friends and associates don't want to associate with me. "Let's keep in touch" means no, I don't want to see or talk to you and don't call back. Only kooks have mental problems and only lazy kooks wangle a disability determination for them. And these aren't dumb people. Like them I also hold a professional degree.

    I now have two personal friends with whom I can talk about anything except how I feel. They have engineer brains and I'm not an engineer. Doctors are just as bad if not worse. They're body mechanics.

    If I have physical symptoms resulting from anything I don't hesitate to going to a doctor but I never mention my mental issues even though it's detailed on my medical record. (And they never ask.)

    I don't have psychiatric emergencies anymore. I've got a bunch of drugs and know how to prudently use them. I've talked so much about myself and "how I feel" over the years I no longer want to do it except with the shrink who has to be informed about the drug effects.

    For me, and only me, I find life easier NOT trotting out my feelings for discussion with anyone. If I just go about my business I can forget I'm not normal. I don't need to avoid the liquor department at the supermarket. Booze is neither bad nor good. And I don't announce my alcoholism. I let the waiter pour the wine, let it touch my lips if there is a toast and then later on try to trade with a table partner my full glass for their empty one. Or I just ignore it.

    I never put down discussion groups. After I quit drinking I quit AA. Some people go all of their lives because it helps them and possibly others. For me, attending one just brings back a flood of memories from Hell.

    And that's all I have to relate. The meds are working and I'm fed up with talking about myself.

    Regards.
     
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    stillme83 responded:
    My Husband and my Mother are there for me...honestly I do not know what I would do without their support and understanding. I am naturally very light hearted, so they help to keep the laughter in my life...even if it is by picking on me when I am going through shifts in my mood! Not hurtful jokes, but just belly busting laughter! Laughing is my favorite!
    laugh often
     
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    An_243893 responded:
    I only have 1 person who understands me; but she has a life of her own and I can't and don't expect that she run to me each time I have a crisis. I've found that reaching out to people on the internet are my best source of support. I need people like me to reach out to. Those are the ones who truly "get me" and don't think this illness is just a crutch for bad decisions and behaviors.
     
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    An_243880 responded:
    I would have to say my psychiatrist and therapist first and then my friends. Fortunately, my daughter is out of the home and in graduate school so she doesn't have to witness a lot of what goes on. Unfortunately, because this disorder is so public it is impossible to hide, at least severe mania, from even the most casual observers. My collegues have been suprisingly flexible and non-judgemental. Working has been a huge support. Feeling competant and capable in at least one area of my life is incredibly healing.
     
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    crankyforeal responded:
    This is a great group, already reading all of your stuff is helping me to really push to get My mom and I diagnosed, just need to know, were funny outgoing family women n we are only us, we need support, were fighting n we tear eachother apart cause we love one another so much, shes resting, finally, i just want her and me to be Happy
     
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    Chris_WebMD_Staff replied to crankyforeal's response:
    Welcome Crankyforeal. I'm glad you found your way here. If you go to the top of the page and click on the post now, bit orange button, you can choose to start your own discussion. I know you'll find great support here.
    Chrissy~

    Life is too short, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
    Author Unknown
     
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    ColoradoSunsets responded:
    I have No One to talk to about my BP problems. I wish I did though, because I could somehow help myself get thru all these bad bad feelings and struggles I face everyday.
     
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    dms6802 replied to emy0312's response:
    Hi! First let me say, your not crazy and anyone and everyone here understands what you go through. Bipolar is no different than someone else having diabetes or lupus,etc. You just have something to deal with and medicine will help. NO ONE is born perfect out there. Remember that everyone has something to deal with. Don't dispair we are all here with you and for you. As far as people in your family saying things, how unfortunate for them. Thats ignorance talking. Your smarter than that! Be the smart one and shug it off as ingnorance!
     
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    mercygive replied to dms6802's response:
    Hi! I need to vent here a little today. First of all, dms6802, thank you for the reminder that our families can be ignorant of our struggles with bipolar disorder. My husband is my emergency contact and often refers to me as a pill popper. I checked myself into a 3-week inpatient recovery hospital many years ago and I remember his resounding voice "you have let me down." I'd like to think that we're beyond that now but I may be reluctant to seek emergency help in the future. We have talked about the symptoms and treatment of this disorder since then because there is more literature and resources available to educate ourselves. However, his comments remain and although they are not intended to be hurtful- they are. His comments also compound the stress I experience with the side effects when taking my meds, and subsequently, add to the frequent urges I have to discontinue taking my meds. If he notices that I have stopped taking my meds then he reacts and becomes irritated with me because he knows that my condition will worsen without them. It becomes a ping pong match that is hard to stop.

    Lately, there has been a lot of stress in my family due to illnesses. The least bit of stress or tension I express (that everyone expresses on occasion) my family members immediately freeze up and become defensive with such comments as "I (we) can't take this right now — you need to calm down right now" as though they expect me to escalate into an uncontrollable episode even though they know I am taking my meds. With comments like these, I feel like a child. You're right, we have to be smart and shrug off those hurting comments. However, in the management of our disorder, we are urged to listen to our family members as their responses can be an indicator that we are 'falling off our rockers'. I want a trusting two-way communication but often it turns into a one-way street of which we have lost our right to be heard and that infuriates me to no end.
    Choose life, God's Grace and humor - mercygive


     
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    DDem23 replied to HeidiSue3's response:
    Yes I understand, My wife try to understand but shes off base at times


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