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    This Exchange simulates the original Couples Coping Support Group. It is designed to help persons with concerns in their relationships, family, marriage, seperation, divorce, etc.Offering a wide range of real world, personal experiences, information, knowledge, suggestions, & views from real people.
    Christmas Time Will Soon Be Here Confessions! 11/30 thru 12/4
    GuardSquealer posted:
    Well another Christmas will soon be here. The stores shove it down our throats so much anymore, they had Christmas candy out the day after Halloween.

    But I think most of us still like the holiday season for our own reasons.

    So is there something you want for yourself or your family that won't tell anyone that you want? Maybe it's something big and you don't want to sound greedy? Or something too expensive and you don't want anyone to feel guilty about if they don't get it for you?

    Is anyone still disappointed from their childhood about not getting something they really wanted? Like that Red Ryder BB Gun?
    GuardSquealer responded:
    I also admit that I was played like a fool last night. I had to drop a horse of in Louisville yesterday and went alone. On the way back I stopped and was fueling up, when this young man approached me. He apologized for asking what he was about to ask, and proceeded to tell me a sob story about how he and his girlfriend were traveling back to Cleveland from TN and she lost her purse at a restaraunt along the way.

    Now they were out of gas, no money and no credit cards as someone had already used one of them, so they all had been cancelled.

    Said his girlfriend was so embrassed she wouldn't get out of the car. Had their little dog with them.

    Driving a pretty nice car, so the story sounded possible to me. It was cold, windy and snowing.

    I felt bad for him, and gave him a twenty. He thanked me profusely and went to another guy and told him the same story. That guy coughed up some cash too.

    So the kid walks inside the station and then comes out and pumps some gas into his car, I asked him if got enough to make it home, he said he got $27 and hoped it would get them close. I figured it probably wouldn't so i gave him another twenty and told him have a good holiday season.

    While I finished pumping my fuel I got to thinking about it, and decided maybe I was a fool. So I thought well if he pumped $27 into this car he was telling the truth, if not I was a sucker. So I walked over to his pump. Sure enough he pumped 1 gallon into his car. $3.05. So I decided I would have felt better if I had not looked.

    So I hope he enjoys the $40 bucks I gave him. I would give another $40 bucks to hear the conversation between him and his girl as they were driving away talking about what a sucker I am.

    In the future I will only offer to pump the fuel myself or buy them a bite to eat. But never will I give a beggar cash again.

    So this is probably a new scam. If you stop at any busy stations watch for it. I am thinking about doing this one myself. It was $139 to fill up my truck maybe I could get a bunch of people to pitch in?
    tlkittycat1968 responded:
    I hate when people ask what to get me because I can never think of anything. I have more than enough clothes and enough jewelry. My parents were great while we were growing up and bought us pretty much whatever we wanted for Christmas, within reason of course.

    I think I'm gonna ask DH to get me a big box of flavored teas. I love drinking tea during the winter and like variety.
    FCL replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    I find that the easiest people to find gifts for are those with a theme - for instance, one of my SILs loves angels and cats. I'd need to be a special kind of stupid if I couldn't find a gift on either one of those themes I wish there were more people like that!

    How about looking for some ideas for you?
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    tlkittycat1968 replied to FCL's response:
    DH does play the drums so I'm thinking of a gift card from the music store. I told him if he could think of anything for his drums under $20, let me know.

    I love people who collect things or have themes. I love cats and a local sports team so anything pertaining to either one would work for me. My brother likes the same local sports team but he's been a fan for a number of years and it's getting harder to find items he doesn't have that don't cost an arm and a leg. I always ask my SIL what my nephews and niece like so I'll know what to get them for birthdays & Christmas.
    candy352 replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    I feel that I will already be receiving all I need and want for Christmas. I will be induced early right before Christmas and will have my first child! My dad asked me if I had made a Christmas list yet a few weeks ago. I told him he can get the baby anything he wanted.
    Candy 26, DF 36, PG with 1st child, EDD 1/6/12
    SC_Cat responded:
    I have had several people ask me what I want from Christmas... I have told them all the same thing, for my son in Afghanistan to be able to come home... Today is his 21st Birthday... Wish I could just hold him and let him know how much I love him... Remember our troops all over the world that won't get to spend Christmas with their families...
    stephs_3_kidz responded:
    I don't ask for extravagant gifts so when my husband asks me what I'd like to have I will tell him. All I want this year is some clothes (so he'll get me an Old Navy gift card) and a perfume set I found at Belk.

    What I really enjoy at Christmas is teaching my kids what a gift in itself it is to give to others, seeing my kids' faces on Christmas morning, and making precious memories with my family.
    queston replied to stephs_3_kidz's response:
    We've really de-emphasized the material aspect of Christmas over the last few years. When our kids were young it was kindof ridiculous the amount of presents they'd get between us and the grandparents.

    Now the grandparents are old and don't send gifts anymore (they might send a check), and we've dialed it back, too. Even though we are by no means a wealthy family, we really have what we need, materially, for the most part. And the things we do need are things like newer, more reliable cars, repairing the holes in the ceilings from when we replumbed the upstairs, etc.
    3point14 responded:
    This year the fella and I will be doing a little gift exchange, but the real gift is going away around New Year's Eve together. We prefer to do trips and events to gifts, and it's been such fun just looking at different bed and breakfasts, I can't wait for a few days to spoil my lovey with attention

    I've started a tradition of giving my parents a decoration at the beginning of every season so they can have a little bit of me around the house, which they love. I have weird taste, so it's always something funky and off-beat. Otherwise I don't go too nuts, and don't plan on going crazy this year. We do a lot of baking, which is fun and I wind up giving most of that away.

    My family was always very generous with me during Christmas, and there's nothing I can think of that I didn't get that I wanted. I try now as an adult to make sure to do what I can to make the hoidays special for my family,which doesn't usuallymean elaborate gifts.
    RoseLynn02 replied to SC_Cat's response:
    I'm sorry you don't have your son with you now during the holidays. It brings tears to my eyes to think of all the families who have members not there because they are over seas...or worse... Anyway I just wanted to tell you Thank you...or rather your son. I don't agree with this war, but I do support our troops. They maintain our freedom & I have nothing but love, respect, & appreciation for your son for that as well as the other men & women out there doing the same. I'm sure you're proud of him for making these sacrifices for our country. Thank you for bringing him into the world to stand up for our rights. I say that whole heartedly, with tears in my eyes as a mother with 2 little ones, thank you for your sacrifice as well.
    RoseLynn02 replied to GuardSquealer's response:
    That's funny. Sorry of your negative experience there, you already deal with enough of it being a guard. I always just think of it this way, if they went through all of that to get the money they must think they need it more than I did. & if I gave it up then I guess I didn't need it so bad anyway. I don't put strings on things if they ask me for "food" $ & I give it to them & they spend it on beer then I guess they really "needed" that beer, but once it left my hands it wasn't mine to worry about any longer. It goes where ever it goes.
    RoseLynn02 replied to candy352's response:
    Congrats! That's awesome. My youngest is a December baby, the 19th. Having a Christmas baby will be cute. A lovely gift.
    RoseLynn02 responded:
    My husband gets me professionally done family pics for x-mas each yr, but this year we can't afford it. I like holding on to the memories of how the kids looked at different ages, how we all looked as a family. It's special to me. We usually get them done twice a year, but not this year. That's ok though, compared to some I think that's far from the worst that could happen. I just want my kids to have a good Christmas. My husbands mom will be here & they haven't seen her in almost a year, so that will be great.

    Nothing material I didn't get that I wanted as a child that I'm disappointed about that I can think of.
    Spankyrae responded:
    There's beggars like that throughout Toledo. I find they have a long,drawn-out story designed to throw you off track so you'll feel super bad and give them money. I'm tempted just to call them out on their BS one day. But it may not be a safe thing to do.

    I'm considering telling everyone I don't want anything for Christmas. I can afford anything I need or want, and the materialism of the holiday is really getting to me this year. However, I'm enjoying all the Christmas decor much more this time. Odd. I don't even decorate at home.

    I confess while in spinning class, I find I compare myself to the other women in there, as most times they're slender or of a healthy weight. I've gotten over those insecurities a long time ago in the gym, but for some reason it's coming back a little bit. I feel great for being my weight and sweating it out in a tough workout class. I feel like a normal sized, fit person with an overweight shell (for now).

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