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    I seriously can't take another minute of this hell!
    Mel123mc posted:
    I have been depressed along with major anixety most of my life. For 21 years I was on 2mg Ativan 3xday. For some unknow reason too me,he finally convinced me I was just a pill head,I was fine,had no reason too be depressed or anixety,it's all in my head. So after 3 failed rehabs,countless er visits,seizures,so sick I couldn't even bath,he bathed me,for 6 weeks straight I was so sick I wanted too die.Back too the depression,I've always been able too get over it and move on. Well those days are gone now,I have been in bed for 3 weeks. I have become a weak,hopless,sad,pathetic,useless,worthless person. I have no reason too even be alive. But I'm too scared too do it. I don't laugh,have happy thoughts,everything in me is gone. I have been on every medication that has been made,nothing works for me. So I guess my question is why in the past could I pull myself out of it and now it has consumed my life. Why can't I get up and shake it off and carry on with my life? Why I have become so weak and so ready too go? Could it be possible that someone can mentally and purposely have beaten me to my final breaking point? I'm damaged goods,have no idea why I am still on this earth. Any suggestions,thoughts,opinions would so greatly appreciated...
    zaketaz responded:
    I suffered depression for many years without getting help, I would get to the point of hitting my head to relieve the pressure I was feeling. I finally saw a therapist for it, and and now medication, I too feel like it is more consuming in my life. He told me that it is going to get worse before it gets better. Sometimes I wish if that was true I shouldn't have tried to get help with it. Have you seeked help for this lately. You are important and special, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. And if you need help, don't let them tell you it's just in your head
    GroovyMonday responded:
    With major depression I spend an inordinate amount of time in bed - either struggling to sleep or getting too much. Nothing much gets done. You asked the question about shaking it off and moving forward; I don't think it gets any easier as we age. Depression is like a disease; you try to control it, it controls you, and sometimes it goes into remission. There are a few good days. But it's there, lurking. Dr. Robert Sapolsky of Stanford basically says depression is the worst disease you can have. Going it alone just feeds into it.

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