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    hope64 posted:
    This is my first post. I've never joined an online anything. I am female and am 70 lbs overweight. It would be nice to talk to others in the same boat.

    I don't know where I've been like I haven't seen this coming. I weigh 196 lbs. Why did I do this to myself.

    I'm prettty, smart, independent, etc. why would I cover up my physical gifts with 70 extra lbs. I feel like I am hiding.
    pauliev responded:
    HI Hope 64, My name is Paul I joined yesterday, so I am a newby along with you. I am 280 lbs, and want to lose 100 lbs, I don't know, it happens and eating used to put us in a comfort zone i guess. I have been up and down in my life and I am geared up to make this the last "up".

    I never tried this before either, a group or online type of thing however in the first few responses your going to see that these folks out here are knowledgeable, caring and friendly and want to see people beat down this nasty thing we deal with.
    hope64 replied to pauliev's response:
    Hi, Paul. Thanks for your reply. I was on the phone with my younger sister and could not reply sooner. FYI, my youngest sister died of cancer four months ago. I have not taken it well, I have put on some weight because of drowning my pain in alcohol. I am a very addictive person and it seems like I stop one addiction and another pops up to take its place. I am fighting smoking. It's unhealthy, an addiction, causes cancer and I don't want to have my family watch me die of cancer.

    I am 48 years old and I want to be the best version of me that I can be. I want to embrace the best possible health partly out of respect for my sister that did'nt have her health.

    It's a hard road and I want to love myself along the way. How is your journey going?
    pauliev replied to hope64's response:
    Hi Hope,

    I am deeply sorry for the loss of your sister. Addictions i feel will come much easier when we use them as a relief for anxiety or some other tragic event in our life, I see food for comfort. Some people choose other things, TV, alcahol, drugs ect. Whatever brings them relief. I guess the majority of those addictions will cause some sort of long term physical ailment which we don't want to deal with.

    it seems like you know what you need to do now find the strength to pull it off.

    I have suffered with my weight pretty much my whole life. Up and down and over again. This time it seems I might have overcome some part of the metal obstacle and I seem to have a different focus on it. I don't know maybe I am older at 54. The battle rages on and each day is a new challenge with it. It's hard, it's a fight that you have to dig as deep inside yourself to win it.

    Please feel at east to communicate with me at any time. As I said earlier the folks on here are wonderful people, and I have only read responses on here since yesterday, but you can see how caring they all are.

    totallywiggedout responded:
    Hi Hope, Welcome.
    I first read your intro about an hour ago, but was using my phone and hate to use those little keys to post blogs, since I'm so darned long winded with my replys, lol
    Plus, I gotta say, I was basking in the warm light of Paul's response and comment about this caring community.... like a cat rolling around in a sunny streak on the carpet, I basked for awhile
    With your second post, I see that you have recently been through a terrible loss. I am sorry for that and hope that coming here, not only to begin a new journey toward physical health, but to vent about everything that you wish to "get out there" that you will also begin to heal mentally and emotionally. That is truly my hope for you, Hope.
    To begin, most of us suggest filling out a Food and Fitness planner either here on WebMd or, also has a good one. These are excellant tools because once you plug in your starting stats, they tell you how many calories and how much exercise to shoot for every day. The WebMd one starts you out with what looks like a big amount of daily calories, not really intending for you to EAT that, but to subtract FROM that by exercising, to reach the intake goal of , say , around 1200 calories.(which is about average)
    If , as you say, you have an addictive personality, you'll LOVE this charting, it does get addictive, esp if you have the time to log AT the time of eating and exercising, It can take up a whole lot of time during the day, just to chart, lol..... and it's sorta fun to watch how your calories add up.
    Gotta say, we try to focus on health and nutrition here. Alcohol is a whole lot of calories with NO nutrition, and so many bad health side effects that I urge you now, please, try to get away from that before it really DOES become a problem.
    Once you get your planner up and running and see what you need to do to get going, then, go shopping.... grab a cart and just go to read labels. Everything that you LIKE to eat, try to find better, healthier, lower fat, lower sodium, lower sugar options of the same products.
    With fresh fruits , produce , potatoes and grains... eat a rainbow everyday. White is NOT a color on the rainbow, white pastas, potatos and rice should be substituted if possible with peruvian blue, or sweet potatoes, and whole grain pasta and rice. We suggest this simply because there is more bang for the buck with these choices, more nutritive value , more taste and more fiber in most cases than the reg white versions.
    Try to make your meals from scratch, using fresh meats, veggies and fruits, so that YOU control what goes into them.
    And , walk honey. I can't begin to tell you how much better you will feel if you get outside in the sunshine and walk a mile a day. It clears your mind, but lets you think without all the everyday "clutter" that always intrudes. It can go a long way to improve your mood, your outlook and your health.
    Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

    If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

    If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill

    jis4judy responded:
    Hi Hope
    welcome I can relate when My Mom passed away thats when My life fell apart I felt like there was a huge empty feeling inside I tried to fill it with food gained 100 pounds over 5 years that feeling I had never got filled with the food only time and inner reflection helped ... yes it is like hideing it is a good thing you woke up before it got worse ... I removed that weight by eating as healthy as I could and changed my life to better than it was before ...this healthy focus I can;t say cured but my life long asthma hasn;t needed medicine for the last 7 years and the reason I began this journey was my eyes I was diagnosed with macular degeneration and the nutrition quest was an effort to heal my eyes well they are doing well too
    So stick with us and we all help each other as best we can
    Hugs Judy:)
    SW 247 CW 149ish maintaining

    Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
    life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

    justmejust replied to jis4judy's response:
    Judy, my mom died when I was 30. I was busy starting my family but put on weight after that. Now they are teens and I feel more meloncholy for my mom. What types of inner reflection helped you?

    Baby steps, to a healthy lifestyle change. When you change your thoughts you will then change your weight. Getting healthy is about progress, not perfection.
    jis4judy replied to justmejust's response:
    Hi Laura I am sure I was looking inside to find memories of my mom that were wonderful and appreciateing her instead of focusing on her last few minutes. that was the main proccess ...I was 47 when My mom passed I am the 7th child of 8 so for some reason I have been accepting of my siblings passing lost 4 of the 8 only 4 of us left ..
    so far it worked to focus on my Moms greatness and her humaness she had faults just like me ...she was great at learning from mistakes ...Hugs Judy:)
    SW 247 CW 149ish maintaining

    Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
    life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

    abnersmom responded:
    Hi Hope! Welcome aboard. I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother to cancer when I was 28 (I'm 59). It was tough. I have a food addiction and an addictive personality as well. After being on this journey for almost 2 years, I still cannot have certain foods in my home (chips especially). I haven't given them up completely just eat them occasionally when I'm at a friend's or eating out. If fruit and veggies are your only options at home for a snack, then guess what you eat!
    Debbie SW 265 CW 150 maintaining - Don't exchange what you want MOST for what you want at the moment.
    blondie454u responded:
    Welcome aboard!
    Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
    hope64 replied to totallywiggedout's response:
    Kim, thank you for your kind words. I feel like in alot of ways I am coming out of a fog. I am also on medication for bipolar disorder and some of them cause weight gain. I am happy to say that I have gotten of two of the meds that were prescribed for me two years ago when I was told I was disabled (by my bipolar disorder) and could not work anymore. I have lived on my own and supported myself since I was 19.

    That was a loss and I think I ate more because I had no other focus.

    Since I joined this discussion group and joined, I have followed that calorie and excercise program and have already lost 5 lbs (since Sunday).

    I am super happy but now my calorie intake is 1018 per day.

    Sorry I didn't see your post earlier but today is the first day I have signed back in.

    I live in Nashua, NH and the winter and snow ans cold makes me hibernate. Where do you live?

    Have a great, healthy day
    Have a great
    hope64 replied to jis4judy's response:
    Judy, thanks for the hugs. I am single and live alone (with 2 cats) and it's amazing how little physical comforts, ie hugs kisses, I get.
    I am amazed by your major weight loss and your quest for health. How is the macular degeneration now?

    I am sticking with this, I already lost 5 lbs!!! by folowing the webmd's guidelines.

    I'm in Nashua NH and we have bunches of snow, I was shoveling the other day for hours with my 70 yr old Dad. So, I burned alot of cals there.

    I also have asthma and hopefully I can get off my advair as I lose weight.

    I miss my sister, she was the baby. It made me realize that health, both mental and physical, is the most important thing.

    I cannot live in denial because I'll get sick. My other sister has MS and Lupus, so there's a higher chance I could get them.

    My health is in respect to the lack of health both my sister didn't have.

    I used to run 6 miles every day and that kept me sane. I'd like to loss enough weight so my back and knee pain subside and I can run again.

    I am on a journey and I'll make each day count and love me.

    have a good day
    hope64 replied to pauliev's response:

    You seem like a great guy. I appreciate your words.

    My weight/eating issues began when I was 15 and entering puberty. I weighed 103 lbs had no issues with food or dieting then my dad and my boyfriend both said I was fat. My jeans were tighter because I was developing hips but I had no mom around to tell me that was normal. So I starting starving myself, then binging this progressed into bulimia, then later anorexia.

    I ended up losing so much weight that people were telling me to stop. My mother, who is divorced from my dad, would cry when she saw me. I got really weird carrying my own food around, etc.

    I want to make sure that I do not enter any of those eating disorder danger zones. I am 48 and 54 is not old!!

    Because of the extra 70 lbs I have very bad back and knee pain which I will not take pain killers for. The pain is telling me that my body is out of kilter. Optimum health and happiness is my goal.

    I deserve to be the best I can be.
    jis4judy replied to hope64's response:
    thanks for asking about my eyes Hope
    My eye doc is amazed at my eyes accually improving over the last 4 years he said I was abnormal Lol i loved that
    I do believe it is because I am eating healthy foods and I eliminated most proccessed foods and the junk in restraunts
    I still have things like cake and pie cookies but only occasionally not every day or not even every week . It is a matter of being aware of whats in the food I don;t eat anything with transfat aka hydrogenated oils ... and zero artificial sweeteners only natural foods and it seems to be working ,
    I have been on my journey almost 10 years it will be 10 years in april of this year . that asthma went away after about 4 years on plan . aches and pains reduced right after the majority of the weight was removed ... the eyes took the longest even though it was my intened target ...On my last exam the eye doc saw improvement inside my eyes some of the signs were fading and going away this is very exciteing to me because there was zero treatment for this problem when I was diagnosed and in 2006 a new treatment was available and my eyes responded to the meds injections into my eyes better then anyone else in the progem win win for me
    I do believe I am giveing my body the nutrition it needs to heal itself my journey was exactly that I was trying to give my body what it needed to heal itself Oh it has been 2 years since I have needed a treatment in my eyes and the weight emovale was a complete surprise benifit
    I hope the same for you
    Hugs Judy:)
    SW 247 CW 149ish maintaining

    Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
    life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

    hope64 replied to abnersmom's response:
    Thanks for your response. Since I am an addictive person . I realize that I have to live one day at a time with all my issues. I also have to remember to ask my higher power for help and guidance.

    The thing is it seems once I start addressing one issue another of my issues pops up like a ball held under water then released.

    Your weight loss is inspiring. This community is so giving and welcoming. I find it more helpful than weight watchers and I don't have to pay $12 per session.

    I am sorry you lost your mom. I still have both my parents but they are 70 & 66. Since losing Laura I am so afraid of losing anyone else.

    I am super emotional and that may come from also being bipolar. I worry about both of them. My dad is overweight (all belly fat) and eats mosting fried food; he also has hypertension.

    My mom has smoked for over 50 years. My living sister has MS & Lupus. I am the only one that is free of illness. I want to keep it that way.

    I know I can't run their lives or change their livestyles. I can help me and maybe be a good example.

    I am addicted to mandarin oranges, so that's my sweet treat. I cannot have certain things in the house either.

    keep in touch.

    Spotlight: Member Stories

    (see my response to Andie's blog on Committing to Committment 4/3/11)

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