Skip to content


    Attention All WebMD Community Members:

    These message boards are closed to posting. Please head on over to our new WebMD Message Boards to check out and participate in the great conversations taking place:

    Penis too big for comfort of woman
    cmw1979 posted:
    Contrary to what all the internet scams say, bigger isn't always better. I am of above average size and must be careful not to cause pain for my girlfriends. My current GF appears to be especially sensitive and I must be very careful not to goo in too deep as this hurts her. Since I have to think about this, it takes some of the enjoyment away for me. Are there any kinds of spacers or pads that I can put around it that limit the depth of penetration. Certain positions such as missionary with her legs together seem to help a lot but I would like to be able to do any position without having to think about it. Are there any kinds of spacers made just for this and has anyone here used them?
    tlkittycat1968 responded:
    There are donuts you put at the base of your penis that help limit how deep you can go it.
    stevesmw responded:
    Too long is better than too short. I am of average length and still need to be careful not to go to deep when on top.
    There are other positions which I would like to be longer to get more penetration; facing on the side, and partner on her back and I'm on my side. The facing side position allows either partner to do the thrusting and control the depth.

    You should be able to work on your awareness of penetration.
    A device that limits penetration, might prove uncomfortable to your partner if you are hitting her with it whenever you thrust.
    tlkittycat1968 replied to stevesmw's response:
    I think some women would disagree with you when you say too long is better than too short.
    stevesmw replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    Nothing can be done to improve a penis that is too short.
    A man should be able to control the depth of his thrusting.
    My wife has said "too deep" and I haven't had any difficulty complying.
    An_253636 replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    Speaking as a woman who has been there... I had a hysterectomy at an extremely young age. In fact I was still a virgin. Fortunately my ovaries were saved so I did not go thru menopause until the time I was due to naturally. But I far more enjoy sex with a man whose penis is around the 4" mark than over 6"! If it is long I end up waking up the next morning feeling like I have been beat up on the inside and not in a good way! And even when giving a guy a blow job, I much prefer a guy with a 4" penis that some guy who expects that I ought to be able to choke down 6" because he sees it in his favorite porn flicks! Forget that! It is not going to happen. I happen to have a gag reflex that is intact. So guys, with shorter penises, we ARE out there and we love you! (And I LOVE to blow you!).
    dfromspencer responded:
    Use those donuts TlKittycat recommended. You and your partner might enjoy them? I have heard that women like them also. They say it hits their clitoris just right?

    What have you got to lose? Go to a Victoria's, or a porn shop, you will find many different ones!

    Good luck!!!

    buckeye45680 replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    my wife would be one of them. Her ex was long and I'm not and it frustrates her that she can't lay on her stomach and me be able to pound her. It's difficult for me to get much penetration that way and it's the best way to get her to orgasm. I haven't been able to successfully get her off like that really since we first started having sex.
    cmw1979 replied to buckeye45680's response:
    We seem to be working around this issue just fine, now that I have gotten used to not being able to go in all the way. I might still buy one of these spacers next time I get the opportunity. Either way, she does say it is better for me to be a little large than too small.
    hairyd replied to cmw1979's response:
    If your large or if you small; It knowing how to work Your penis. In and out; up and down, around and around.Each inch of your shaft needs to touch each of her nerves for full pleasure. Working both the inside and outside of her vagina. Your finger or tongue will help her relax. Therefore be prepared for your big cock. (yes to you it's a big boy. Its fatter than your finger.
    Always remember your penis is unique, just like every man.
    cmw1979 replied to hairyd's response:
    We have worked around this pretty well as we get used to each other. One position that helps is missionary with her legs together. That one helps a lot. I have to be really careful doing doggie so I just make sure I don't go all the way in. There is a good inch or more of me left when I bottom out. I slowly work in and back off when I start feeling resistance at my tip.

    Helpful Tips

    Difficulty having an orgasm?Expert
    Try reading Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women by Julia Heiman , Joseph Ph.D. LoPiccolo and David ... More
    Was this Helpful?
    6 of 9 found this helpful

    Related Drug Reviews

    • Drug Name User Reviews

    Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

    FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

    For more information, visit Dr. Becker-Phelps' website