Skip to content


    Attention All WebMD Community Members:

    These message boards are closed to posting. Please head on over to our new WebMD Message Boards to check out and participate in the great conversations taking place:

    what do you do if a friend with bipolar symptoms tells you they want to kill you during a fight...
    An_240054 posted:
    how seriously do i take someone with symptoms of bipolar disease or maybe serious depression, that threatened to kill me after a heated discussion...i am afraid for myself but i do not want to abandon this friend either because i am his only friend...would you consider this an irrational but not serious threat? could someone with medical experience help me?
    Amelia_WebMD_Staff responded:
    Welcome to the community,

    I know that this is a hard situation with you caring for your friend and his/her health, yet keeping logical that you must look out for your own safety.

    Please post your question in our Bipolar Community for suggestions from members and experts that are more experienced with this type of situation. If you feel your that your life is being threatened, do not hesitate to call the police. You may want to also suggest treatment to your friend when you find a time that he/she is in a good state to discuss your concerns.

    Wishing you as well as you friend the best. Please take care.
    An_239461 replied to Amelia_WebMD_Staff's response:
    My sister is bipolar & Honestly, I try to keep away from her as much as I can since I never know what "attitude' I'll run into.
    Forget about the indifference and selfishness, which could be a personal problem because we're siblings because I know she would never treat any of her friends or certainly her children like she treats me. Also, she says the meanest things from out of nowhere, like....."I don't feel sorry for you, there's always something wrong with you".
    So when I met a friend with bipolar, after a year I stopped being friends with her. I realized she had similar traits to that of my sister.
    I wouldn't kick someone to the curb because of being bipolar but I surely won't let anyone Sap my energy (or what's left of it)
    Little is said about the person who is in relationship with a bipolar person. Too bad, because I'm disgusted myself with learning about their symptoms that really affect everyone around them and not knowing how to deal with them!
    RoseAdam replied to An_239461's response:
    A friend of mine also, I keep reading and studying about it,
    because I love her. The information has given me insight into the disease and brought us closer.
    Jodimaem replied to RoseAdam's response:
    Bipolar is very serious!! Your friend must work with a professional and must be medicated. I know several adults with bipolar and they take themselves off of their meds because they feel better, bad news!

    Take care of yourself first and be as good of a friend as your are comfortable with. Maybe check to be sure your friend is seeing someone and if not maybe suggest to go with her. i f she refuses I would stay away until she gets the required help and I would tell her that!

    I feel frustration, there are obviously no rules, go with your gut!
    Jacie37 replied to An_239461's response:
    Hi Amelia:) I married a gentle man 14 years ago who choose not to tell me he was bipolar. Wrong thing to do..we moved in together 2 months after meeting each other and even though we both had quirks between us we felt we could work them out.
    Then without planning we got pregnant and all hell so to speak.
    He was raging at me daily and i knew something was very wrong...I knew nothing about bipolar but knew he had to be accesed by a someone in the mental health field and found out he already had a therapist and was supposed to be on lithium. But he stopped taking it before he met me.He was put in police lockup 2 times from neighbours calling police because of threats he was yelling to me.i was terrified of him and had no siblings. No one i knew wanted to get involved.
    His therapist got a court order to hold him 72 days or more in the phych ward and get him back on lithium.Took a week with me involved and learning what bipolar was and a promise for weekly sessions. He went without fail i made him take his medicine and he picked fights so often i lost count, He hated affection and i suffered for it and the kids, my 15 year old barely hugs even though i hugged her constantly. I read about a new cocktail that could make one with the milder form with bipolar so very much better and it was like having a new man in my life. With his stubborn
    and i am stubborn too we are making this work. It may not be a normal marriage but we are very slowly working on it.

    Amelia_WebMD_Staff replied to Jacie37's response:

    What is a normal marriage? I really would love to see a definition in this age! How interesting it would be?! lol

    I have a story that is actually very similar to your own and commend you greatly on your hard work and staying on top of keeping your family together. You should be proud of yourself, your husband and children as well.

    Best wishes to you all in the future!!
    RoseAdam replied to Jodimaem's response:
    I am very aware this serious, I have been her friend for years, I care enough to ask her what medicine she is taking and what for and what doctors does she see. She is comfortable with me
    because she is aware she must take care herself. She knows
    that I am her only friend who understands her and she is free
    to speak to me. I am not ignorant about bipolar, I recoginze
    when she has a problem, and she trusts me to recommend
    her to talk to phyciatrist and therapist. She listens and calls
    her doctor, if I recognize she needs it. Believe me, she has
    never threatened me. She is really a gentle person, who
    has bipolar. We have been friends for years and there has
    never been a problem with us. She has only been hospitalized
    once. She takes her meds regularly. She sees her dr's
    regularly also. I am glad I can be her friend. I know she
    loves (appreciates) my friendship. No one should have to
    suffer alone......I will always be there.
    pitrishka replied to Jacie37's response:
    I really admire you for sticking to it! in my case I am dealing with a man who refuses to seek treatment even thought he is aware of his condition...unfortunately I am also stubborn ...and I love and feel really bad for him and don't have the heart to leave...I realize that I have "a bit" of a psychological problem as well for jeopardizing my safety from the several times he threaten and emotionally abused me...I had many sleepless nights crying, not understanding how come he treats me like that...the hurtful things he would say to me and the way he reacts whenever he gets angry or frustrated with me -which seems to have escalated to the point that he would throw things at me when we are fighting...he never hit me but I don't may happen...
    I do not want to dramatize, but how do you leave someone you love knowing he does not have anybody else for I sick for staying?...
    Jacie37 replied to An_239461's response:
    Not all people with bipolar are like the ones being described.
    There are people who get this disease that are lawyers and doctors and teachers. They are fortunate to have the lesser dangerous form of it and with the right medicine can lead a normal life. My husband is one of those lucky ones..but for 110 years life was awful and scary. With 2 young kids i never knew what mood he was going to be in and the money he blew could have payed off our house more or less..
    He got on a cocktail of tegratol and wellbutrin and for 4 years it has been good, not perfect but good. He still hates giving and recieving hugs from anyone and no personal relations for 114 years. His own therapist told me to move on??
    I said why. Ok i have to give up closeness but he truly is a good man that has always worked, runs marathons for cancer, the mentally handicapped, arthritis, epilepsy also and has raised alot of money yearly. He has always held down the same job before i met him and is well liked.
    Sure his moods are unpredictable but he is my best friend.

    Helpful Tips

    Was this Helpful?
    1 of 1 found this helpful

    Helpful Resources

    Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

    FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.